Completely Overwhelmed

[Deleted member 15881]

I was injured 3 years ago while I was at work,I was hit over the head with a gun and nearly strangled. I've been dealing with workers comp since. I still have yet to receive back pay.
I've had a job for a year and it's getting increasingly harder to cope. Recently I found out my lawyer dropped my case since I didn't call her enough. I had no idea this had happened until my family let me know, and now they feel as if I've been dishonest.

My relationships with the ones I love are so strained and it's all because I was too afraid of being perceived as weak by asking for help. I internalized everything to the point of pushing the ones I care about away. My wife and her grandparents respectively.

I've destroyed the only support system I have, so badly I fear it will never be repaired. The relationship with my wife being the worst, she no longer trusts me, and is tired of trying to help me fix myself.
Part of me agrees with her and part of me is upset that she abandoned me. My work relationships are suffering as well, I'm on the verge of losing my job.

I feel like I'm going to break. My family won't help any longer since in their eyes I spit on the help.
I don't have a Therapist and have no idea how to get one with my limited finances.

I'm alone in this because of my actions and though I've tried to apologize , I've been told its too little and far too late. I'm emotional and angry.

 

[BloomInWinter]

((((((Disillusion))))))

Welcome to the forum. May you find comfort, witness, and healing.

Have you contacted your local victim's advocacy center? You likely qualify for services. Another way to get immediate assistance is to call a hotline and ask for help. Also, if you are in the states, a victim's advocate could be assigned to you if your circumstances meet the requirements.

Hang in there. Hope is not lost.

You don't have to figure this out alone.

 

[BloomInWinter]

Also, if you are on the verge of losing your job, you must see a t. right away and get a diagnosis, then file for ADA help so you can still be effective at work.