Hey. Yeah I know I've been gone for awhile. I had to take a step back and regroup. Fact is, I started running. I met two sisters that I knew existed but never met or talked to before. Well they aren't full sisters I suppose. They're half sisters. Panic! Reason? They're as dysfunctional as I am. They want answers that I don't have. They still ask. Between that and I'm watching a person that means everything to me die. I was always taught to build walls and reinforce those walls with anger and no one will ever tear them down. This guy did (and while wearing a cape so I tease him as doing all the time).
Death is something I'm used to, for those that remember my back story. However, for whatever reason I'm finding all those familiar feelings creeping back in...panic, fear, confusion and anger. I remember shedding tears for one death and that was Mom. For whatever cause I've looked at death differently and have been able to shrug it off. Now my special friend is dying and for the life of me I can't get a grip. I haven't been out of the house for two weeks. I can't even bring myself to go to see my T. I get to the bottom of my stairs outside my bedroom and completely lose it. Between the hyperventilating and hysterical crying, I'm stuck. So now what?
Death is something I'm used to, for those that remember my back story. However, for whatever reason I'm finding all those familiar feelings creeping back in...panic, fear, confusion and anger. I remember shedding tears for one death and that was Mom. For whatever cause I've looked at death differently and have been able to shrug it off. Now my special friend is dying and for the life of me I can't get a grip. I haven't been out of the house for two weeks. I can't even bring myself to go to see my T. I get to the bottom of my stairs outside my bedroom and completely lose it. Between the hyperventilating and hysterical crying, I'm stuck. So now what?
