Childhood Coping: Childhood Vs Adulthood

[KayJ92]

During childhood and teenage years, I repressed and my bad memories and PTSD to cope. They came back when I was 19 years old :/ Now, I'm 24 years old.

 

[journeyofone]

I first used isolation. I used to hide in the top of my closet in my room. Noone ever found me. But i would hear them screaming my name because i had to do something for someone. Then i got to big too curl up in the space. Afterwards, I immersed myself in television late at night. Because my siblings would not let me have choice of program. All we had was a small black and white, where I watched romance movies and pretended i was a princess. I then carried those romance notions and promiscuity into my first few forays with boys, trying to gain any attention from a male figure, good or bad. The most prominent that affects me still as an adult is trying to please. I've bent over backwards in one-sided relationships, tolerated extremely bad behaviour, and gone to extreme to "save" the relationship because it's what I'm used to and I was so starved for attention. It has also affected me in my work, working longer hours to please my manager because it was expected of as a child. All of that has changed the last few years. In family, relationships and work, I recognize the patterns.

 

[SeanCharles]

It’s just interesting that coping mechanisms we used when we were young can follow us into adulthood. However, as an adult, it doesn’t have the same ability of protecting or helping us. Rather, most of the time, it prevents us from living a full life.

So very true! With this comes a whole new learning process. That process requires us to find the path to healing by always keeping the present real and forward, while learning from through reflection of the past with the knowing that what happened in the past can not be changed. The past is a growth tool, it does hide in our shadow as we walk our life journey.

For me, I am rediscovering a sense of purpose in everything I do. I may not like the present at the moment and am preparing for a battle for change which will bring me into the future.

 

[PointlessExistence]

My whole thought process is a control-mechanism. It's an elaborate system of checks and balances that prevents me from living a productive life and keeps me from having genuine feelings (99% of the time).