Day 50 Without Shame!

[AngelKeeperJ]

I have smoked marijuana for 40 years with a few short breaks. I became a grandma Oct. 28th. I am 56. Oy Vey!

On the 6th of October, I said..."good-bye to the high"! The shame FINALLY won, it was a constant embarrassment to my self-worth!! It did help with muscle spasms and nightmares, and I believe it should be legal for 21 year olds like alcohol, but none-the-less it was TIME!

I will succeed this time, because it's time to grow up and CUT THE CRAP!! I don't want to miss anything...memories or time hidden smoking my shame.

I already have early COPD along with asthma, so continuing was just STUPID!!!

So, if you are one who prays, send some up for me, that my resolve will stay unshaken!

Thanks!

 

[cherryblossom]

Congratulations. Keep up the good work.

Remember to bookmark your thread, then if you are tempted, you can easily come here and remind yourself why you have quit ;)

Well done :D

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

Oh, THANK YOU, (((Cherryblossom))) for that idea!!! I'm already prepared, if I find any I might have stashed, to IMMEDIATELY throw it down the toilet!!

It does feel good, even though I've felt some emotions long buried. I will just cry them out and go to my T if it gets real bad. It's time for me to honor ME!

God bless you LOTS!!!

 

[The Albatross]

Congratulations, you sound great by the way. And I love the new granddaughter pic!

 

[ms spock]

Beautiful Picture of your granddaughter! Keep up the good work!

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

Here it is December 6th, and that marks 2 whole months without my 'crutch'. Even through some REALLY STRESSFUL days, I have maintained my promise to myself.

Thanks for all the encouragement. I'm learning to 'speak my truth' with NO shame interfering, or is that interferring? Heck, lately words just don't 'look' right. I need to do more reading, obviously!! :)

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I am really happy for you AngelkeeperJ. I think what you are doing seems to be just the thing for you. Congratulations. It is not easy to quit a long habit but you show it can be done. You have such a great attitude. Like I said I am really happy for you. I hate shame. It is a killing pain. No more need for that in your life. Hugs.

 

[BloomInWinter]

Way to go, (((((AKJ))))))!

 

[ms spock]

Living life without shame is such a good idea. I am inspired by your journey.

 

[anni]

Ha! That's kind of a staggering achievement, whoa! Thanks for sharing, good for others who BACKSLIDE on other dumb habits, like these stupid cigarettes. ( Not witching at another member, it's me ). MUCH congrats!!

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

Just did a recount...up to 69 days! In spite of my Dad's death 2 weeks ago today. I know he'd be proud, even tho he never knew. NEVER thought I could it, especially with the emotional triggers going on.

 

[ms spock]

Congrats AngelkeeperJ!