Dear Therapist

[jude]

I know what you are saying. I am scared out of my mind too. I went to the T yesterday and didn't give him what I had written down but told him I hate me.... I hate you I hate everyone. I am angry and tired of all of this. It did not phase him at all. He said I am sure down the road you will not like me a lot or like some of the things I say but I will still be there for you. I am going nowhere. I thought yeah right. I am very afraid. I do not want to trust anyone. They leave you. They abandon you. I guess that is no differnet than the other people with PTSD feel. We all seem to feel like we are the only ones going through this but am finding out we are not. I am tired of trying though. I am so sick of it all. I guess like you I will still go to my T next week....what else can I do at this point

 

[Nighthawk]

jude,
I brought up this forum to my T today, told her as sad as it is, I know because of this forum I am not alone and for once I can be understood without re explaining myself 10 times.

Nighthawlk

 

[Iam]

I have to say kudos to you Nighthalwk, you are standing up for yourself! Yes, it is horribly scary, but you are asking your T questions and making her answer you. You are making sure she knows what your needs are. That is perfect! Now, hopefully you can trust her guidence a little more. Trusting her is essential if the two of you are to get to the meat of things and work throught them. You are really coming along well in that area! Pat yourself on the back, you deserve it!

 

[anni]

I used to worry a little, that some of the people I could converse with the easiest were here, like something was wrong with that. I don't think so. I do not believe we are irretreivably broken, or terribly different or some exclusive club but there are some THINGS which were changed through whatever anyone went through. I don't think I mind anymore that I'll never be the same again but it's awfully exhausting managing 100 percent of the time in a world full of people who do not function the way I do, and do not understand it well-even the kind ones who wish to. Being here, around others you don't have to explain yourself to is just a relief to me. Not only does nobody care how on earht you function, they pretty much know what you're talking about, too, over things. I knd fo feel like one can stretch out on the sofa, kick off my shoes and forget to try to be what ever normal is supposed to be for a little while.

I hope you're able to feel safer each time you walk back in that door.I hope next week's list of questions are also answered, and maybe there's some peace in the answers for you.