Death And Dying

[somerandomguy]

I remember when I was a teen, there was a saying about suicide that all the adults would tell us: suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. The trouble is, most teens (and a lot of non-teens, too) can't think about things like this. Studies have actually shown that the brains of teenagers cannot determine between a temporary and a permanent emotional state. So much for adult wisdom.

Later on, when I studied Buddhism, one of my teachers had a different saying: suicide is a temporary solution to a permanent problem. And if you believe in multiple lives or rebirth, it makes sense. Killing yourself isn't going to get you out of the wheel of life; you'll just come back and go through hardship and dissatisfaction all over again.

But when I feel suicidal, none of this makes any difference. All I can do is to wallow in my misery and think how much better off everyone would be, including myself, if I was gone. But I know intellectually that that's probably not true.

 

[jelena]

She cat, are you still on this forum? Because I have the same problem,it is recent (eight, nine months) so I would really like to know how you now cope with it.

 

[nimkekaa]

She cat, are you still on this forum?

If you click on a person's name then you can see when they joined the forum and when they were last seen on the forum as well as other things. She Cat was last seen on April 23, 2011.

I have the same problem

You can still use this thread to talk about the same topic or you can start your own thread but if your thinking about death and dying a lot then I hope that you reach out for some support or see someone to help you with how your feeling.

We are here to listen and support any way we can.

 

[Hashi]

jelena, I also have the same problem.

Killing yourself isn't going to get you out of the wheel of life; you'll just come back and go through hardship and dissatisfaction all over again.

This, and something else as well, is what stops me. It's also what makes me hate things all the more... which makes me want an exit all the more... but that isn't much of an option...

It's really difficult. Sorry for anyone else who's struggling with all this too.

 

[jelena]

Hi Hashi, I am new on the forum I just see your post. How long does it last in your case? How does the fight go now? Can you find some root of all of it?

In this period, my emotional part will tell me that the very root is hidden in the way life functions, but the rational part thinks that there is some cause and we can overcome our fears and that-hard--feeling which I do not know how to call it any more. Because, we all share same world and so few people have that obsession.

 

[Hashi]

Hi jelena,

Welcome to the forum.

I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time with this. I saw your other post about it. It sounds like there might be two things going on for you. One is thinking a lot about this question, which I think many people do, especially when trauma experiences are likely to make us consider things like this. The second is when it actually becomes an obsessive thought, and relates to severe anxiety. This is rarer, I think.

In my case, the thoughts about death and what it means are in the "thinking a lot" category. The nature of my traumas makes this a question I can't ignore. I do think it's the way life functions, and I like that you said "hidden in", because I want to know why life is like this, but that's hidden from me. For me, the best way to calm my fears about death is to try to do the best I can with life. I don't see anything else I can do.

I also have severe anxiety and obsessive thoughts, but those are about something different. I see that as an anxiety disorder and it's one of the symptoms of PTSD for me. I think the more work I do on healing from trauma, the more this will ease. In the meantime, I'm trying to approach it both rationally and emotionally. I do what I can to manage it, and I try to accept it and see myself with compassion.

 

[Marie10]

Your not alone. I too have these thoughts but do not act on them, I tried in the past but it obviously did not work and I am glad. I've had friends take their life and it's very painful. Please do not act on this.

The reason why I stick around is because I have children, even thought I'm not a full time mother and I do not want those who care about me to be in pain.

I have so much shame and guilt inside and cannot seem to get it out that it stays inside of me. I want someone to blame, I want justice, I want an apology and I want to forget all the trauma's. I'm hurting.

My solution now is to see my therapist next week. Starting to heal and finding someone who you can trust and talk to have saved my life. I want to hear someone say that they love me, I want someone to say that I'm a good person. I hope that you know that I care and want the best for you.