Sufferer My Therapist wants to talk about my death. Is this normal?

[Friday]

At 71 you’re looking at dying within the next 20 years.

So it’s a reasonable topic of conversation… what you want out of the life you have / expect to be living. Spending 50 years in trickle therapy, not on the table. Spending the next 10-20 rehashing the past vs the next 10-20 revelling in every joy, wish, desire? A SERIOUSLY important discussion to have.

What do YOU want??? How to best facilitate THAT???

My only red flag is that wasn’t a 1st-5th appointment convo, but is nearly a year in.

Whether you’re 71, or 15 with leukemia, when death is likely… soon? Pretending it’s not, is kinda dumb. Speaking as someone whose family is either dead before 50 or lives into their 90s. You survived rhe 50 & under. So you’re looking at maaaaybe 20? Or 10? That’s real time. Spend it on purpose.

10-20 years to live? Is a loooooong time. Whether one is at the beginning or end of their life. Grief, in spades, when it’s a 10 or 20yo kid who will NEVER get their first XYZ, much less their best, their most profound, their perfect Goldilocks of neither best/worst but deepest & most beautiful. But??? It’s also grief when given that limit at the end to do… everything you never did, ever wanted… and missing that opportunity.

Welcome to the community!

 

[faith_88]

My therapist is the same way with his beliefs. We are just touching on the PTSD that I have had buried for 20 years and he minimizes it- the main reason I stay is because Ive had him for years and am wary of changing doctors and getting to know someone. He is really arrogant a lot of the times about his beliefs as well. He has a kind soul in there , but I think what we can do is if we are strong enough to tell our therapitists about sticking to the main purpose (PTSD) related issues , the relationship and sessions would work much better. I am having mine tomorrow and will tell him exactly this. Thank you for posting your story , and I hope your next session gets better .

 

[StarChild]

My therapist is the same way with his beliefs.

He is really arrogant a lot of the times about his beliefs as well. He has a kind soul in there

This looks like a contradiction in itself. A therapy should center in on your needs, not on the "believes" of an arrogant therapist. I understand you're weary, nonetheless...looking around for other therapeutic possibilities doesn't hurt anyone and maybe just maybe could set you free from a dependency on this one therapist?... As their behaviour doesn't sound as though its healthy and profitable for someone suffering with PTSD... - I've got just a strange gut feeling while reading your post... Encouraging greetings. StarChild

 

[PamelaS]

My therapist is the same way with his beliefs. We are just touching on the PTSD that I have had buried for 20 years and he minimizes it- the main reason I stay is because Ive had him for years and am wary of changing doctors and getting to know someone. He is really arrogant a lot of the times about his beliefs as well. He has a kind soul in there , but I think what we can do is if we are strong enough to tell our therapitists about sticking to the main purpose (PTSD) related issues , the relationship and sessions would work much better. I am having mine tomorrow and will tell him exactly this. Thank you for posting your story , and I hope your next session gets better .

I hope that you can muster whatever it takes to look into a therapist who meets your needs. They are there to help us. If that is not happening, then they are not doing their job. I’m not afraid of fire someone who is harming me, making the situation worse, or not benefiting me. I know how important it is to feel comfortable, especially with your therapist. But many times the comfort we get from familiarity is not helping us, especially when what we are familiar with is unhealthy. Wishing you well moving forward in your healing journey.