Sufferer My Therapist wants to talk about my death. Is this normal?

[ironbed]

I've been working with a good psychoanalyst for a year now. We have a good relationship. I'm 71 years old and from day one he was convinced I had PTSD. But now I think he is becoming frustrated by my inability to follow the advice he offers.
A few weeks ago a psychiatrist confirmed his diagnosis: PTSD.
At our last appointment he finished the session by abruptly telling me next "next week we'll talk about your death".
He is a confirmed atheist and he hasn't been shy about reminding me about his personal beliefs on the world's religions.
I believe there is an afterlife but I'm unsure of an all encompassing spirit shepherding us all. I guess I kind of believe in a comforting universal nirvana, heaven etc.

As a psychoanalyst has my therapist strayed away from my PTSD treatment and could his beliefs affect my psyche going forward and cause me more anxiety?

 

[parrotthepolly]

As a psychoanalyst has my therapist strayed away from my PTSD treatment and could his beliefs affect my psyche going forward and cause me more anxiety?

This question is for you to answer. If you don't see eye to eye with beliefs of the after life, could tell him.

I don't believe death is an unusual topic given your age, or any age for that matter, it can happen to anyone anytime with no warning but is it beneficial to your healing? Was there any trauma surrounding death that he saw bothered you?

 

[ironbed]

This question is for you to answer. If you don't see eye to eye with beliefs of the after life, could tell him.

I don't believe death is an unusual topic given your age, or any age for that matter, it can happen to anyone anytime with no warning but is it beneficial to your healing? Was there any trauma surrounding death that he saw bothered you?

He has never talked about any deaths he may have witnessed. I feel he is pushing his personal beliefs onto me in an arrogant passion and in a triumphal way. I don't have his intellectual ability to embrace his atheist beliefs which I find irrelevant to my treatment for PTSD. In fact I feel he is inflaming my PTSD with his insistence on pushing the issue.

 

[parrotthepolly]

He has never talked about any deaths he may have witnessed. I feel he is pushing his personal beliefs onto me in an arrogant passion and in a triumphal way. I don't have his intellectual ability to embrace his atheist beliefs which I find irrelevant to my treatment for PTSD. In fact I feel he is inflaming my PTSD with his insistence on pushing the issue.

I meant have you told him any of your experiences with death?

You did mention you and the therapist have a good relationship but should let you him know it's not helping that he's pushing his beliefs and let him know your own, or otherwise the next session won't be worth it.

 

[Movingforward10]

Why is he saying what you will talk about? It your session, you decide.
Have you told him how you feel about all of this?

 

[Survivor3]

Counselors/therapists aren't allowed to give advice.

 

[Sues]

I feel he is pushing his personal beliefs onto me in an arrogant passion and in a triumphal way.

This is a huge red flag. Therapists are not allowed to do this. ever. Also, what Movingforward said. He works for you and is there to support and guide you.

I'd have a serious conversation with him and lay down the ground rules and boundaries. If you feel he can't respect your boundaries, then move on to someone else because that's another huge red flag. As a therapist, he should be able to listen to your concerns and adjust his approach.

 

[Sideways]

I feel he is pushing his personal beliefs onto me in an arrogant passion and in a triumphal way.

It’s well beyond the scope of typical psychoanalysis for the T to start talking about their beliefs. But your reaction is, to me, the most relevant part - if you think your T has become arrogant, maybe you’ve reached the end of what this particular T has to offer you. Which is totally fine, and very normal for therapeutic relationships of all kinds. Sometimes they get to a point where they’ve run their course.

Now that you have a diagnosis, is it time to start knuckling down on that with your therapy? Maybe hunt down a trauma-specialist, who will be able to follow a modality that is evidence-based for ptsd recovery. Psychoanalysis has its benefits, but isn’t one of the treatment modalities that ptsd responds best to.

 

[ironbed]

Why is he saying what you will talk about? It your session, you decide.
Have you told him how you feel about all of this?

He became quite animated about his take on atheism and, or, my lack thereof, and no I haven't talked to him about it.
Once I gather my thoughts on this I will express how I feel about the situation next appointment.

This is a huge red flag. Therapists are not allowed to do this. ever. Also, what Movingforward said. He works for you and is there to support and guide you.

I'd have a serious conversation with him and lay down the ground rules and boundaries. If you feel he can't respect your boundaries, then move on to someone else because that's another huge red flag. As a therapist, he should be able to listen to your concerns and adjust his approach.

I think you are right. I see him again next week and I will definitely let him know how he left me feeling and this topic is off limits for me. Many thanks.

 

[whiteraven]

He became quite animated about his take on atheism and, or, my lack thereof

My T is a Zen priest, but we didn't start talking about religion (or lack thereof) until I expressed my foundational beliefs, which are Buddhist. Now we talk about it a lot, but he never pushes. NEVER.

You should be guiding the discussion (unless you have an issue doing so), and it's definitely concerning that he is openly discussing atheism (or anything religion-related) without an indication from you that that's where you're ready to go.

 

[Susan Jane]

I've been working with a good psychoanalyst for a year now. We have a good relationship. I'm 71 years old and from day one he was convinced I had PTSD. But now I think he is becoming frustrated by my inability to follow the advice he offers.
A few weeks ago a psychiatrist confirmed his diagnosis: PTSD.
At our last appointment he finished the session by abruptly telling me next "next week we'll talk about your death".
He is a confirmed atheist and he hasn't been shy about reminding me about his personal beliefs on the world's religions.
I believe there is an afterlife but I'm unsure of an all encompassing spirit shepherding us all. I guess I kind of believe in a comforting universal nirvana, heaven etc.

As a psychoanalyst has my therapist strayed away from my PTSD treatment and could his beliefs affect my psyche going forward and cause me more anxiety?

Welcome! He has no business pushing his beliefs on you, any of them including not following his advice. It is not his job, and unprofessional. I have dumped many therapists for this reason. It is very disappointing I know. Therapists are people and not everyone is good at their job. I would try and protect myself… listen to my instincts…which is hard with PTSD, at least in my case

 

[PamelaS]

I've been working with a good psychoanalyst for a year now. We have a good relationship. I'm 71 years old and from day one he was convinced I had PTSD. But now I think he is becoming frustrated by my inability to follow the advice he offers.
A few weeks ago a psychiatrist confirmed his diagnosis: PTSD.
At our last appointment he finished the session by abruptly telling me next "next week we'll talk about your death".
He is a confirmed atheist and he hasn't been shy about reminding me about his personal beliefs on the world's religions.
I believe there is an afterlife but I'm unsure of an all encompassing spirit shepherding us all. I guess I kind of believe in a comforting universal nirvana, heaven etc.

As a psychoanalyst has my therapist strayed away from my PTSD treatment and could his beliefs affect my psyche going forward and cause me more anxiety?

I see a red flag with him abruptly saying anything at the end of an appointment. You should be leaving in a positive frame of mind. Personally, I would look for someone else. I agree with all of the feedback that you received here. So very glad that you reached out. Wishing you well moving forward. I agree with looking for a therapist who is specialized in trauma so that you can solely focus on that.