It used to be that sex was a big drive. It never dictated the purpose of going out, I did that to have fun and if it happened cool, if not I still had just as much fun. For the past while I have seemingly lost interest in it. I have always been a firm believer that people are WAY too uptight about sex in general. They fear it, they are disgusted by it, and a lot of times refuse to acknowledge that it even happens. I have never had these views. Not because I am some dirty guy who walks around and undresses women with my eyes, but because I just never thought of it as a big deal.
Over time this just doesn't seem to interest me really. Again not that I don't find my wife and other women attractive, the desire just doesn't seem to be there. Even with an endless supply of whatever you want to find online when your alone, doesn't really do anything for me. I have never had much trouble in the past finding a date, or girlfriend. I'm not Brad Pitt and never looked at someone as "out of my league". Mostly because I never believed in that "league" thing anyway. I just look at someone for who they are and would rather date the girl next door with a mind and personality vs the glam model who has a rock for a brain.
My wife in utterly convinced that I am not attracted to her. Yes she is physically neglected and no that's not fair on my part. This low testosterone thing I hear about I don't buy into, at least not in my case. Everything works just fine and I have no issues with intimacy when we do actually have it. My wife is bi, so yes we have had many "playmates" join us in the past. We had a strong foundation with each other so inviting other women into bed was not to replace, fix, or fill in something that was missing. Nothing was missing.
Even though we had this open relationship I was not looking for a 3rd or 4th to join us. I approached it the same way I did when I was single, if it happens fine, if not who cares I'm here to have fun not look for sex. We pretty much have taken a hiatus on inviting other women in because the intimacy between us has dissolved. She has told me she is just as attracted to me now as when we first met, and my feeling are the same towards her. I just lack the desire to follow through and become intimate.
I don't know if medications will help or make this worse. I was on an anti depressant a number of years ago not long after coming back from Afghanistan and well, it made it so nothing worked. At that point the doc told me he could prescribe me that "blue pill" so I basically stopped taking them all together because that just seemed to compound the problem and make it worse. I am willing to try them again but a different medication and see if this helps my mood and depression.
I guess where I'm going with this is if other have shared this lack of desire, and how the other side feels when they are the ones who are neglected knowing or thinking these are the reasons it is happening.
Over time this just doesn't seem to interest me really. Again not that I don't find my wife and other women attractive, the desire just doesn't seem to be there. Even with an endless supply of whatever you want to find online when your alone, doesn't really do anything for me. I have never had much trouble in the past finding a date, or girlfriend. I'm not Brad Pitt and never looked at someone as "out of my league". Mostly because I never believed in that "league" thing anyway. I just look at someone for who they are and would rather date the girl next door with a mind and personality vs the glam model who has a rock for a brain.
My wife in utterly convinced that I am not attracted to her. Yes she is physically neglected and no that's not fair on my part. This low testosterone thing I hear about I don't buy into, at least not in my case. Everything works just fine and I have no issues with intimacy when we do actually have it. My wife is bi, so yes we have had many "playmates" join us in the past. We had a strong foundation with each other so inviting other women into bed was not to replace, fix, or fill in something that was missing. Nothing was missing.
Even though we had this open relationship I was not looking for a 3rd or 4th to join us. I approached it the same way I did when I was single, if it happens fine, if not who cares I'm here to have fun not look for sex. We pretty much have taken a hiatus on inviting other women in because the intimacy between us has dissolved. She has told me she is just as attracted to me now as when we first met, and my feeling are the same towards her. I just lack the desire to follow through and become intimate.
I don't know if medications will help or make this worse. I was on an anti depressant a number of years ago not long after coming back from Afghanistan and well, it made it so nothing worked. At that point the doc told me he could prescribe me that "blue pill" so I basically stopped taking them all together because that just seemed to compound the problem and make it worse. I am willing to try them again but a different medication and see if this helps my mood and depression.
I guess where I'm going with this is if other have shared this lack of desire, and how the other side feels when they are the ones who are neglected knowing or thinking these are the reasons it is happening.
