Difficulty Focusing

[MouseWedger]

Thanks everyone, for the insight, and Ms Spock I'm glad I started it too! Reading through the posts here made me stop and think about other things that I "zone" out on, and I realize I should bring this up in T tomorrow, because I do it while driving as well. I lose whole chunks of time while driving, not just a minute or two, but were talking thirty or forty minutes at a time. I don't know if its dissociation for me, or lack of focus or what, but it's clearly a dangerous thing that needs to be brought under control. Has anyone had any luck trying to somehow force themselves to stay in the present and not mentally wander away?

 

[maddog]

Grounding grounding grounding MouseWedger, this is one of its most important uses. Combined with determined and repetitive self talk and reminders to stay present and to focus on the physical world around you, it can help a lot, but you do have to work and be committed.

It's such a scary thing to realise that your mind can take you far away from your physical surroundings. Of course once upon a time this was a very adaptive response to trauma, it's just not so cool in the real world of today.

Maddog

 

[ms spock]

Thanks everyone, for the insight, and Ms Spock I'm glad I started it too! Reading through the posts here made me stop and think about other things that I "zone" out on, and I realize I should bring this up in T tomorrow, because I do it while driving as well. I lose whole chunks of time while driving, not just a minute or two, but were talking thirty or forty minutes at a time. I don't know if its dissociation for me, or lack of focus or what, but it's clearly a dangerous thing that needs to be brought under control. Has anyone had any luck trying to somehow force themselves to stay in the present and not mentally wander away?

I think the driving thing is an automatic thing that lots of people do - you know the way so you just do it. I have heard heaps of people without the challenges of ptsd say they zone out whilst driving. I don't know which it is for you but a lot of people do it.

ms spock

 

[ms spock]

Grounding grounding grounding ...

Of course once upon a time this was a very adaptive response to trauma, it's just not so cool in the real world of today.

Maddog

So gently, gently, - giving up habits that were once life saving is difficult. Focus, Focus, Focus which I must say today I found very hard. Whilst I was painting I was okay but felt an insatiable need for cake and chocolate afterwards.

 

[MouseWedger]

I think the driving thing is an automatic thing that lots of people do

Ms Spock,
I did bring it up with my T, the driving and zoning thing. She said that with everything that has been going on it appears that I'm dissociating while driving. She said it's happening because like you said, the road is so familiar that I don't need to pay too much attention, which leaves my mind with time to think on the other things that are going on, which it clearly does not want to do any time soon.

Grounding grounding grounding MouseWedger, this is one of its most important uses

Maddog,
I've been working on the grounding thing, right now it seems to be extra hard for me because I'm living in a "House of Triggers" if you will. I was proud of myself yesterday though. Something incredibly triggering happened, to which I would normally start to throw punches, and I found a way (I'm not sure how) to stay in the present.

Thanks again guys, for reading all of this and for giving insight :)

 

[maddog]

Oh I know Mouse, I've been reading of your house of horrors experience and shuddering. Grounding, or achieving any kind of inner control in that environment, would undoubtedly be enormously difficult. Good on you for having managed yesterday's trigger so well. When you are physically caught up in an abusive or at least a toxically negative environment, self care becomes a superhuman challenge.

I hope there is a way you can escape from there soon, you deserve better.

Maddog

 

[MouseWedger]

Thanks Maddog. I'm working on it, and as a general whole things get a little easier every day, not much mind you, but a little. I'm hoping that as T goes on things will get continue to get better.
Mouse

 

[ms spock]

Has anyone had any luck trying to somehow force themselves to stay in the present and not mentally wander away?

Mindfullness meditation or walking meditation can work a bit - that is what I am using. Doing painting is really helping me, so much so - it is making a big difference.

A hobby is a good thing. Something that absorbs you. For awhile watching Star Trek was it for me. Exercise is really good if you can get up and get motivated and do it regularly. But I can't seem to maintain that.

I started with one minute meditation per hour. I started with one minute of being present a minute.

The other one is to every now and then stop and ask your self what is actually going on now and for five seconds notice what is happening in my body. The body scan meditation can be really good to start noticing what is actually happening in your body.

I am still very much a beginner with all this.
ms spock

 

[ms spock]

Gosh I was going to type something but by the time I scrolled to the bottom of the page I forgot what it was I was going to say!

Egads!

 

[MouseWedger]

Haha Ms Spock you sound like me lately! My T say's it's OK to have my mind wandering and forgetful like this for the time being, as long as it doesn't start to get me into trouble, because there is something that it's avoiding by doing this. Long story short? I'm trying desperately to not let it get to me :) In doing so, I may have literally just now figured out why it's happening. Thanksgiving is in two more days, after that comes Christmas. The holiday's have always been hard on me - happy times but always triggering and depressing at the same time - and this year is especially hard because I am so far from my family. Maybe this is why my brain wont let me stay in the present...

 

[kimberley dawn]

This is all just so me too. Another thing that's happend is that I can't look at several (more than 4) people/ cars / bird whatever, and say how many they are. Have to count: one, two, three..... !! Before my mind worked by the number 5: It's 4 times 5 cars minus 3 so it's 17 cars there - in a splitt second.

Now it's like you all say here, - the what? a book? consentrate? phuuhhh gotta get that sleep.

Sad you and so many others have to deal with this too.

 

[Genta]

Yeah, I had huge problems with not being able to focus and forgetting things all the time. Six sessions of Psychotherapy has helped me a lot.