Dissociation Questions

[Kubash16]

1. I see so many people on here say “I’m dissociating so much right now”. How do you know? I think I dissociate on some level and don’t realize that that’s what happened until afterwards.

2. Are these things considered dissociation?

A. Memories cutting off at pertinent parts.

B. Chunks of time (months) missing from memory.

C. Zoning out while doing something, like driving/working. Not noticing that you have zoned out at all until you are snapping out of it and when snapping out feeling groggy/a little nauseous.

D. Daydreaming. Every single time your alone, or not actively interacting with someone.

E. Having days or hours where you just don’t feel all here. Like your mind is off in space and it takes a minute before you realize someone is talking to you or what they even said.

There’s probably more that I just can’t think of at the moment.

 

[ladee]

All of the above for me. I still do it when I am under a lot of stress or a lot of unresolved things are going on in my life.

 

[Kubash16]

See T has mentioned it as a possibility and recently gave me the DES scale/test/thing. But I’d never heard of it until T and so I’m just trying to figure myself out. I don’t seem to meet everything I see listed around the internet. And I definitely don’t realize I’m doing any of those things until afterwards so how would I be able to ground effectively in the moment?

I’m just really curious how to effectively ground because driving on the way to class I completely zoned out three different times. I have no idea why, and didn’t realize any of it until I was coming out of them.

 

[ladee]

Hopefully others will come on and share how they ground with this. I personally have not been able (or willing) to change it. I do not recommend it as a state of being all the time, but I find it to be a much needed coping skill for my busy mind.

It doesn't bother me or scare me. And yes, I do not remember some things, but I would be that way anyway from stress keeping me from concentrating..

You will find your own way with this one, and you can always ask your T to help with some grounding tools.

 

[Kubash16]

That makes sense. It just unsettles me mostly because it happening can cause an accident. He’s taught me some, but just stuff that I can do to bring me back to reality during it. It’s frustrating.

 

[Missycat]

A good post and very thought provoking @Kubash16
I suppose most people at some time dissociate ie driving home from work etc and get home but cant remember the journey !!
I always knew something wasnt right when i would loose time or zone out or many times when i was being abused i would be outside looking in or looking from above ! In addition to flashbacks i still dissociate quite regularly and paricularly if im tired, stressed or triggered. Its an amazing coping mechanism and it protected me to an extent when i was a kid. I didnt know what it was or that it was called dissociation until i started therapy , and working with my t has helped it reduce and my management of it so much better. I dont loose time anymore.

 

[Kubash16]

A good post and very thought provoking @Kubash16
I suppose most people at some time dissociate ie driving home from work etc and get home but cant remember the journey !!
I always knew something wasnt right when i would loose time or zone out or many times when i was being abused i would be outside looking in or looking from above ! In addition to flashbacks i still dissociate quite regularly and paricularly if im tired, stressed or triggered. Its an amazing coping mechanism and it protected me to an extent when i was a kid. I didnt know what it was or that it was called dissociation until i started therapy , and working with my t has helped it reduce and my management of it so much better. I dont loose time anymore.

That’s pretty much the boat I’m in. I know I should be grateful for disappearing so much during the abuse, but I want to know. I want to know exactly what things happened when and where the heck was I during months of lost time.

I want to be able to identify what’s causing it now, but having a hell of a time and like I mentioned before I don’t want to cause an accident either. And not driving is not an option in any world.

 

[Skywatcher]

I get a physically fuzzy feeling all over my body and become dizzy. I do it at therapy when things are too much, but I will tell her that I am dizzy or she will pull me back when she notices.

 

[Mach123]

I feel like I lost time. Like I might walk into something. Absent minded. Like when I talk to the therapist and I'm switching around between parts and I'm aware of it. I have to relax and drive home. Everything is all stirred up. I just naturally come back after awhile. It's not all that unpleasant. I'm just aware of it, that's all. That's what I assume it is anyway. It was much more prominent the first few years. I remember thinking maybe I should wait a little before I drive.

 

[ILoveLife]

I have a lot of awareness into my dissociation for some reason. I'm aware I'm being "pushed away" (don't know how to better word this) or that I'm the numbing kind of dissociated.

I don't know why and don't know how I reached this awareness.

 

[Reflections]

Dissociation is merely disconnection. How mild or how severe, how infrequent or chronic, the disconnect is varies. So not everything will sound like your experience because there's a lot of ways to experience disconnect, or people interpret their experiences differently. I would have realized much sooner I had a dissociation disorder if I related to the things I read on the net, but I didn't. People talk about floating above and I don't relate at all even though my dissociation is severe and chronic 24-7. Moreover I was unmindful of what happens so I didn't realize the world looked flat or that I felt like just a head. I also experience different things at different times. Like sometimes my hand doesn't feel like mine, or my reflection looks wrong, but this is not all the time.

Practicing mindful throughout the day may help exercise the skills to stay present. This is improvement that doesnt rely on you knowing when you're feeling dissociative and will help you recognize what it feels like to connect vs disconnect. Overall self care, emotional regulation, mindfulness all help me to feel safe and lessen my anxiety which helps with dissociation.

 

[IceQueencop]

@Kubash16 for awhile, I didn’t realize I was dissociating until I looked back either. That’s really the only way I know I’m getting better, by looking back and realizing how messed up my head was.
I still dissociate in different ways, auditory exclusion and sensory distortion. Sometimes I’ll feel like the floor is disappearing from under me.
For grounding, a very intentional physical act sometimes helps, like stomping my feet. But, it takes practice to connect that action to moving back into your body.
While driving, to disrupt odd thoughts I have found an essential oil jewelry or keychain type diffuser is helpful.
Also, I usually turn off the radio so I can just focus on my thoughts and driving.
When cars start to fly at me (sensory distortion) I know it’s time to stop driving for a bit.