Poll Do Relationships Survive PTSD Better Based on the Carer's Gender?

[shiraz]

I have been wondering for some time now if relationships where the carer is female survive PTSD better than if the carer is male... or vice versa, or perhaps it has no bearing?

I am looking for votes based on experiences here with comments based on real personal experience.

 

[Nicolette]

Hi Shiraz, I added a poll for you. If it's not what you want please PM me.

 

[Mina]

My relationship has thus far survived, and my carer is male. However, I don't believe that his being male has been a real contributor to the relationship's survival. Yes, he puts up with a fair amount of crap, but has shown no interest in learning more about PTSD, nor in helping me develop coping/recovery strategies and sticking to them. He sort of sweeps it under the rug, really. He IS kind and supportive of me in general, and willing to partially fund therapy (he feels guilty since it was his dog that bit me) and lets me talk if I want to, but I think he doesn't want to understand that sometimes I need *him* to be more of an adult than I am capable of being when I'm triggered. I don't know if that makes any sense.

From what I have seen here and from what I know of the PD/military community, the carers who seem most interested in helping their partner cope/recover and developing strategies for doing so are female.

 

[Nicolette]

Females are natural nurturers....its just the genes and nothing personal.

 

[Robyn]

Actually I think it depends more on the gender of the sufferer. Males have a tendency to be more inward with their pain. They would rather leave than hurt those that he loves.

Kind of like the dog (sorry guys) in the movie Sounder. Crawl under the porch and lick their wounds. Don't want help. Don't feel they should have to ask for help. Their self-esteem drops when they start having to depend heavily on the partner, IMO.