Poll Do You Ask For Help When Ill?

[grace5555]

Evie,

You are not alone in this. I have the hardest time asking for help when I need it the most. I would rather just shut down and go away from everyone and everything whether it is from the physical or psychological pain either one. I guess it goes back to accepting that I truly am ill. =\

Grace

 

[batgirl]

Yeah it's really hard isn't it?? Still working on it myself, it never seems to get any easier. Nice to know I'm not alone though.

 

[pandora]

Hi Evie...I have often thought that it must be extremely hard and challenging for you having both. As you know my son has autism and I have PTSD... a lot of the same symptoms that must be hard for you to distinguish between. You are doing a great job though! You are definately a strong woman.

 

[mightsurvive]

I very rarely ask for help unless its way too late. I never ask friends or family for help. I don't want to burdon them and they don't understand what it feels like anyway (i'm glad for them that they don't know) no matter how much they want to help. The only place I would feel more comfortable asking for help is on this site and a website that I use that is for people who have gone through the same type of trauma as me...both places where people understand. On the other hand I hate brining people down and having people feel sorry for me no matter where I am so I put on my superwoman outfit and smile most of the time even when i'm crying on the inside.

 

[ruddy]

I chose option 2. It is difficult for me to ask for help and I am most often motivated to do so because I am feeling so rotten physically or emotionally that it is interfering with my ability to work.

 

[waif123]

I used to never, ever ask for help, but as I have gone on in therapy, I have found to keep my head above the water, I need to ask. It still isn't easy, buy I know I need to do it to care for myself

 

[anthony]

Well said Waif, and great to see you do acknowledge the importance of your own actions, being to talk, be honest with others and yourself, to get it out of you. Well done Waif....

 

[2quilt]

I knew within 12 hours when I became pregnant when I was 21. My boyfriend thought I was nuts, but I swore that I knew that something was different and that my uterus and my hormones were doing something strange. When I have a drug interaction, or come down with a cold or bronchitis, which i have now, I know it immediately. I also ask for medical help when I think that my psych drugs need to be adjusted. I have no pain tolerance at all, but that may be because of my rare disease, Ehlers-Danlos. My joints dislocate spontaneously. I am good at asking for help because I know that the sooner I get help, the sooner the pain will stop. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness.

 

[TaraJ]

A few times, I was lying in my bed almost deathly ill.
I had a fever of 104 and I couldn't move, but I didn't want to ask for help, because I felt pathetic. My boyfriend has always been so good to me, but he refuses to lean on me, so I was afraid to lean on him..for fear he might think I'm weak. So I just lay there alone, and stayed sick. Eventually, I was able to force myself out of bed and go to work, although I was still so very sick. He was upset that I was going to work so sick, but I felt I had to. As it turned out, I had such a high fever that I was becoming delirious, and found that I was supposed to be at school rather than work. I got in trouble for it, but I eventually made them understand what kind of shape I was in at the time.

 

[anthony]

Welcome Tara....

 

[Cindy]

This is powerful stuff

I don't ask for help because I never know what to say. I also am too proud, I have to do it myself! Stupid. I don't want to appear weak - you're right.

I do have to address this. Not why, but how do I reframe it and change my behaviors. It's like I don't want to express what is hurting me because it makes it reality. I also hurt more sharing and it lasts longer.

Oh, no, time to work again.

Anthony, you are absolutely right it is our responsibility to the few people we have in our life we care for. Or rather only one, my adult daughter.

 

[Jet]

I am rarely able to ask for help. There have been many times when I wished I could or when I should have that I have simply not been able to get the words out of my mouth.

My role in the family was that of the strong one. I was the one everybody leaned on, even as a kid. My feelings, wounds and hurts held little importance to everyone else's and I learned early to put them on the back burner.