Does your t start late?

[UnicornSightings]

You guys have given me some stuff to think on so will reply later. Thank you guys for being honest. Love it!

 

[Lucycat]

My T always did home visits to me, and I live over an hour from his office - goodness knows how far from his last visit. So timing was always flexible. However he would give me a rough time and then telephone or text with an update when he had a better idea. It worked really well. I am a stickler for timekeeping in most things, but I understood that this was different. He would give me the time I needed so I respected that he was doing the same for the client before me.

 

[ninja]

Sometimes. And it varies. Sometimes it’s a couple, other times 15-20 min. She always makes sure I get all of the time. Usually if she is late, it’s because the person in front of me needed the time to close up and get grounded. And she needs a few minutes to switch gears between clients. I am glad she takes the time she needs to switch gears. I know we’ve gone late too. This healing thing does not always comply with a schedule. So we just do the best we can.

 

[Suzetig]

This healing thing does not always comply with a schedule. So we just do the best we can.

No, healing doesn't work to schedule but if you're doing trauma work it's fair to expect people to need to be grounded etc and to build in time to your schedule for that - which may mean seeing fewer clients but giving them all, fairly, the time they needed. My T always has given me the time I've needed but that has never impacted on other clients because of how she schedules her time.

For me it would be impossible if she was late all the time, my schedule is pretty tight in terms of getting kids to and from school - if my T was 20 minutes late I'd lose a third of the season because irrespective of what my T wanted, I couldn't stay behind to make up the lost time. People talk about therapy like it's unpredictable that people will be upset or need time or care. Of course they will but you build it into your schedule and see one less client that day. It's really not difficult to run a schedule that gives people time without it impacting on others.

 

[deeplyloved]

I’ve been reading this thread with interest. I think before my therapist got to know me, she would run a few minutes over on both ends. I remember asking her how she managed to transition so quickly between clients. As we’ve moved forward and delved into more processing, I now realize it’s been months since I’ve seen another client come out of her office or sitting in the waiting area when I come out. I suppose she has built more of a cushion of time around my appointments...because of the times when we have unintentionally gone over the hour. Still, for the most part she is timely and does a good job of helping me transition out of sessions before time is up. I’m grateful.

 

[UnicornSightings]

You guys are so great, you know that? This forum is such an amazing place to grow and learn. Thank you for your honest feedback. I don’t know I this t is right for me because I overanalyze stuff to DEATH but I feel good there. I feel comfortable being myself strangely even though it’s uncomfortable if that makes sense. He has the same humor as me and is just so casual, it really works for me but yeah, I’m definitely picking holes in it all at times. I don’t really know anything more right now as my swirling thoughts about this have died down but I’m gonna just roll with things. And if he’s late again and I’m bothered than I practice direct communication and not the passive aggressive joking I did yesterday. I loathe direct communication but it’ll be good for me. And maybe this will work and maybe it won’t but it’ll be ok either way. And I did write down some topics to discuss with him so we don’t have to have another small talk session. I actually flew a paper airplane at one point lol!

 

[Stephernovas]

You guys are so great, you know that? This forum is such an amazing place to grow and learn....

I just want to highlight that this post, and if you actually do everything you are saying you plan on doing IS the essence of therapy. From the sounds of it this guy is perfect as your therapist. He seems to be pushing you just the right amount to make you uncomfortable, but then is empathetic, kind and inviting enough to make you feel safe. All I have to say to that is, keep going. Please share your list with him. I think you’re doin phenomenal!!! Stick with it! :)

 

[UnicornSightings]

I just want to highlight that this post, and if you actually do everything you are saying you plan...

Aww thank you! I will. And I’ll keep you guys in the loop!

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Yes, my therapist comes to get me about 8 mins after my appointment time each time and usually ends it about 10 to 5 mins til. I was never annoyed by it but always wondered why I pay for an hour but don't get an hour. I came to find out i only pay for 45 mins. He has been 15 mins late before but thats rare and was on the phone with an insurence provider that he had to do between sessions. He also spends a bit more time with new patients (as he also did with me) so has been a bit late over that.

I'd say by a few mins is actually normal. At least for my therapist. He takes the time between when he ends with one patient and starts with the next reading over that next patient's file. I know that as he goes up front to drop off the last patient's file and to get mine about 10 mins or so before he comes to get me.

 

[Deleted member 42665]

Mine has never been late thankfully, and I am always early, he usually waits for me in the lobby because I come when the company is closed.

 

[Emotional girl]

If I am honest I hate anyone being late but on the couple of times my T has been late I have tried to take other aspects into account as he lives about a hour away from where I see him.
There have been times where he has over run with me but there is a space in time between me and his next client so it doesn't affect anyone else.

 

[KwanYingirl]

This thread is very interesting. How similar traits of the professional are perceived by the client. Pretty much every situation has been discussed and some people are ok with long wait times and some aren’t. In my case, I run early. I always get to my appointments. If I get a logjam in my office, the client who had to wait gets a discount. I build in wiggle room in my business and so does my therapist. Hers the thing that is annoying: the clock in the waiting room is fast. The clock in the therapy room is correct and in sync with my car clock. I give him a hard time about it, sometimes I fix it, but he runs on time. His sessions are 45 minutes and he schedules on the hour.i would not accept working with someone who is more than 5 minutes late and 39-45 minutes is completely unacceptable.