Emdr - What's Normal?

[Hashi]

She, as well as my T keep harping on me to work on staying grounded. A concept I find very confusing. Is it the opposite of dissociation? Has anyone been able to develop the ability to stay grounded during stress?

This relates in part to what I'm wondering about in my question to @marylouise. @KwanYingirl I'd suggest starting by doing a forum search with "grounding" in the title, you should see a number of threads that would be helpful (I hope).

 

[KwanYingirl]

It took me a long time to commit to body-energy work. I guess my first foray into it was having acupuncture treatments to treat my illness from chemical exposure to darkroom chemicals. It helped a lot. My acupuncutrist did not approve of me taking meds for depression and would not treat me anymore.I was disappointed, but understood her concerns.

At the time, my depression was severe and was desperate to feel better mentally. So, that was 14 years ago, and I've only begun energy work in the past 6 months. The yoga I do is called yin yoga and is very gentle. We are guided by our wonderful teacher to let go of distracting, negative thoughts. She always has great quotes to share with us. It has helped me considererably to be able to stay present. I just breathe and concentrate on her positive guidance.I have a journal that I write down her quotes and keep t with me to read when I get anxious.

But alas, the benefits only last a few days, and then I'm back to dissociating again. My old standby, I guess. With Reiki, I had one flashback and I asked her to stop. I had a good cry and she just stayed through it with me and let me decide if we would continue. For me, it's a level of trust with these two women that allows me to be open to the healing.

With psychotherapy, I have an approach-avoid attitude, but not with the energy work. Don't know why, just do.

 

[marylouise]

I'm trying to get a sense of something, and hope it's OK to ask. I may be misunderstanding you. Do you see stability as coming primarily from outside, through a type of treatment like energy therapy? Do you see yourself developing more internal stability in any ways?

Sorry if I have not followed your meaning, I'm trying to clarify my understanding not challenge you.

@Hashi,

Of course, it's okay to ask. I wasn't clear, because I'm not sure about how to proceed. Your question is a good one for me to think about. I've had a rough few years, because I've had a lot of physical health issues - not just the immune thing but also endometriosis and fertility treatments which exacerbated my endo symptoms.

I had a lot of habits in place which used to sustain me, such as regular yoga and biking and a lot of social activity. I can't pick up where I left off, but I can replace those habitual activities with others. I can get exercise daily with walks and short bike rides. I can do simple yoga at home. I can pay attention to my breathing every morning for a few minutes. I can cook a nice meal for myself. Even some brief stretching or a short walk outside helps me to stay in touch with my body. I know these things, but I've lost the habit of them. I do them, but not when I'm overwhelmed by memories and emotions. So that is what I was thinking.

I do think body work would help me. I had a masseuse for fibromyalgia years ago who herself had a trauma history, and that was wonderful. Someone like that would be ideal. I don't know how to add that right now though in my new location.

 

[marylouise]

At the urging of @Hashi and my own instincts, I am trying something new. My yoga studio, which is a very nice one, now offers a class in "Shamanic Healing" (in addition to yoga & pilates). So I'm going to check it out tomorrow. I would be happy to discover a means to relate to my own internal, creative energies which have felt blocked over the past couple of years.

 

[KwanYingirl]

Let me know how that goes!

 

[marylouise]

Eh, @Kwangirl, I walked there a different way and got lost (only lived in this city for 2 months). I swear it was me being dumb and not unconscious weirdness. Next week then. This morning I felt a little like 'what? why am I doing this again? Shamanic weird what?' but after I got horribly lost, I was thinking how grounding it might be.

 

[marylouise]

Well, I went to Shamanic Healing today. I was nervous beforehand, but it turned out to be lovely, just lovely. Perhaps if I hadn't worked with my therapist on grounding activities it would have seemed hokey, but the activities were very similar to what I've done as part of therapy. They consisted of a series of guided meditations. It was very grounding, and so positive. I feel a sense of clarity hours later.