Ex-boss Yanking My Chain - I Can't Take Anymore

[Deleted member 93]

I am happy to see you getting used to it... But I am in more than a blunt mood so don't kill me. We both got "used" to having our asses kicked for a time. Now have you accepted it as you need it, welcome it and take it for what it is meant? Or just used to it? Get the two papers done, just do them and relieve that strain. When we are like this two papers can be as much as a book. Get on it. Glad you see the good points but are you feeling guilty for having to accept this help still? Or understanding this is exactly why this help is in place for you? Understanding you need it and this will help you overall?

 

[becvan]

K, am very tired so mind the typos..

ass kicking is good, otherwise I probably wont get the point right now.

um welcome it?/ noooo but trying to adjeust to it ant any rate

the wto papers are for Chris's health card and his child tax benefit (it'a all tied to gother aint it?) so tht will take months as each is a sperate part of the government. have ordered both for it but lot's fo red tape to go.. but i am trying

bec

 

[Deleted member 93]

I see you need a rest bec, take it. The papers are not the issue at top and you just pointed it out, but we will let this rest, you need it.

 

[becvan]

Rest taken.

Okay back to disablity. I had just posted to another member about having to give ourselves support sometimes. Well, helloooo! What is disablity if not support. So I am giving myself support. Duh. Just clicked. LOL

K have to go and look at list.

bec

 

[Deleted member 93]

working on that myself right now... If you hear a big boom, it was my crash blech this shit sucks when it happens and I want to be there for you.

 

[becvan]

I got my vacation pay and employment record in the mail today!!

*does a happy dance*

More happened but will fill in later.

bec

 

[becvan]

Okay taking this list and knocking off everything that is resolved:

-on disablity and all the running around for them

well I think i resolved this one! It's my support.

-Matt's PTSD out of control

All I can do is try to help at this point.. it will take some time but getting Chris out of the house should help.

-My PTSD out of control

one thing at a time here...

-Chris's emtional problems and violent tendencies

He's leaving, not my problem.. his dad can deal with the mess he created!

-Matt scared of Chris, house now turned upside down

Problem solved, Chris is outta here.

-Living room floor ripped up but not finished

Well I will consider this a project in the works...

-Financial issues

Uggh.. well I have no idea right now

-FAC's involved concerning chris's issues

They can chase down his dad and fight it out with him. Not my problem anymore.

-just finished court for jerk off

Am I ever going to get past this? I did good. I did it. It didn't turn out great but it didn't turn out shitty. LOL I think I'm just mad because I'm blaming my entire crash on this.. which is stupid because I have way more issues than that, and that is over with.

-have to apply for child tax benefit for chris, will be big fight with father

Hehe, not my problem anymore...

-was going to move, now might not be able to

Chris gone, issues resolved, I can start making plans again.

-doing PTSD workbook
-doing imagery therapy
-working through triggers

I am taking a bit of a break from these as I was just overloading myself. baby steps...

-broken truck

Well I got it running again, tempoary fix! Good enough for now.

-trying to get chris' id (his dad lost all of it)

Hehe, again not my problem!

-med issues and disablity fight with doctor

Okay I can not mind read can I? For all I know he is going to say about time you figured it out! Have to stop assuming I know what he is going to do. I have everything all organized and ready to go for the appointment, best I can do.

-can't see a pych (on waiting list), no therapist for me, none for matt

Well, if I move, then this is resolved and if I don't move well, I am on a waiting list and with my stress going down, and Chris outta the house, I should be able to focus on helping Matt.




Okay, there knocked lot's off of that! I feel better!
bec

 

[Deleted member 93]

-just finished court for jerk off

Am I ever going to get past this? I did good. I did it. It didn't turn out great but it didn't turn out shitty. LOL I think I'm just mad because I'm blaming my entire crash on this.. which is stupid because I have way more issues than that, and that is over with.

I am really trying to limit advice as I am not in the best state right now but you already know that. But as I was reading and things I have read in regard to this on the board. Do you think this may have some secondary wounding? Yeah, that thing I read about in I Can't Get Over It... Pissed off at the judicial system for such a light penalty after you had to go through so much to get there? You feel wronged? Do you think that may be the angle you need to knock out?

 

[becvan]

I am FURIOUS with the system. I can't get over my anger. I see a cop and I just glare at them! I have to put my head down because I'm sooo angry. So yep I think you nailed that one on the head.

bec