Feel physically ill at the thought of going back to therapy.

[Survivor3]

Hi @Fadeaway , that's terrible that a therapist would treat a client like that.
I hope you can find someone better. I had terrible therapists in the past and it affected me in a bad way so I know how you feel.
all the best to you.

 

[Gs172003]

Not an option unfortunately, I either have to go completely without or stick it out.

That is terrible. Therapists can absolutely cause more harm than good. Can you find an online therapist instead?

 

[grit]

Since March? She does not really know you yet and was presumptuous and unhealthily familiar.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I would say if you have to go without or stick it out, I would go without. I would be afraid that she'd do more harm then just being without a therapist would.

Are there any sliding scale therapist's nearby or ones that even do free counseling? Some churches have free counslors. Not sure if you are religous but even if you aren't, you can advise them of that and that you just need some trauma processing. I'd try to be as picky as you can to find the best sliding scale and/or free one out there.

What are limitations of your insurence. Why can't you go to another therapist?

What about support groups for trauma survivors? There are those around too. At least it's something rather then completely nothing. You know? Also maybe some books can help.

Call around and research online. I am sure there is something.

I am so sorry that you are in this situation! What she is saying and how passive aggressive she is, is totally off!

 

[Fadeaway]

The problem I have is a lack of therapists in the area. There is one mental health clinic. None of the 4 private therapists have openings. Getting this therapist was a battle. Her predecessor at the same clinic WAS flat out abusive. This is more subtle. I was so desperate for a good therapist when I started with her. I don't know what to do. My husband got a good therapist at the same clinc but that is because he has workman's comp insurance.

 

[hithere]

I would not go back! She is using you for something, I don't know what, but she is messed up. For your own sanity, please don't go back! no therapy is way better than getting a mind screw from a therapist. trust me on this one! I've been through hell caused by bad therapy and I have not recovered from it, and it feels like I never will.

Also, there is absolutely nothing wrong with how you felt in the relationship with your ex's adopted mom. What the f*ck is a stupid statement like that from a t? I read that you had this mentoring relationship, and I was wondering if you can reach out to her and get her back in your life? I know many people who remained friends with the ex's family and were treated liked "sisters" or "daughters" forever, not just because the marriage or relationship failed.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

The problem I have is a lack of therapists in the area.

Is there a way to expand the area and drive a bit further (or take a bus a bit further if you don't drive. Or have a friend take you a bit further)? If you live in small town USA, you may just need to go a bit further out and expand the radius some if that makes any sense.

Again, so sorry you are in this position to begin with! It really sucks!

 

[grit]

If this is the case then maybe just maybe you gai some healthy assertivoness and empowerment by setting some boundaries. Even if they do not work at least as an adult you spoke up u like as an abused child every experience has potential to reach us something. You are getting a lot of ad ice and good feedback so you are not wro g or crazy in this. You can request she brings a clock and state politely without a hint of confrontation it is her responsibility to keep the time. And you requesdtno insulting words like borderline or crazy or whatever. Practise before you approach. Take the ball back.

 

[Gs172003]

The problem I have is a lack of therapists in the area. There is one mental health clinic. None of the 4 private therapists have openings. Getting this therapist was a battle. Her predecessor at the same clinic WAS flat out abusive. This is more subtle. I was so desperate for a good therapist when I started with her. I don't know what to do. My husband got a good therapist at the same clinc but that is because he has workman's comp insurance.

None is better than bad.

 

[Fadeaway]

I am writing a letter to her telling her why I am terminating therapy. Would it be over the top to include "I am so terribly sorry that a woman crying because she lost her baby while you were in c-section post ruined your birth experience. Sarcasm intended. Learn some empathy."? I am 75/25 on this. Or is it out of line.

 

[scout86]

Personally, I'd probably write that version of the letter, for my own benefit, but not send it. She deserves it IMO, don't get me wrong, but I've had too many experiences where something like that blew back and created problems down road. I tend to favor the high road. At the same time, I'd sure be honest if you explain your reasons for quitting. Just "honest" with a more professional flavor.

 

[ButterflyBean]

@Fadeaway, I have to apologize myself because I’m not sure what you’re saying/asking here? However, I do want you to know that you have nothing to say “I’m sorry” for because you did absolutely nothing wrong! I think the letter explaining your reasons for termination is a great idea! Try to be gentle with yourself, great job!