Feeling Good With PTSD - Its Not Just A Fantasy

[anthony]

From some of the other more private discussions, I must say I am feeling really good now. Talking is the best policy, venting your frustrations and ensuring your needs are satisfied. Some of mine were not, thus I was getting frustrated and angry, bottling emotions from these aspects of life. The last couple of days now I have been feeling really good within myself, enough to say that if things around me remain the same as they are now, I should be able to remain at the "back to my normal self" stage.

I know some people wakeup and feel great, but they are already telling themselves that its just a blindfold or the like. Its not true, regardless how bad you may off felt for months previous, when you feel good, your brain isn't playing tricks on you, you actually feel good. That means instead of analyzing what is wrong, and when the moods are going to set back in, you should actually be analyzing what went right, or what has made you feel good again. The difference is positive vs. negative thinking patterns. Think negatively, and you will convince yourself. Think positive, and you will be quite astonished by the power of your mind.

When you feel good, what did you do in the days prior to get that way? Have you simply given up thinking about all the bad stuff that has happened? Whatever the case may be, isolate those positive aspects and work with them, and this is how you continue to build more good days vs. bad days with PTSD in my opinion.

What I know, is that I feel good because my surroundings have adapted slightly to take some stress off me, which means, less stress for me, better outcome for me and those around me. Easy ha? Practice makes perfect... but whats harder, is convincing those around you or the problem your having, to backoff and meet your needs a little more, so you can meet its needs. If you can wrap your mind around that one.... :dontknow:

 

[madjon]

learn to think positive and overcome negative thinking, feeling good is not only possible but also something which with time you can feel more of, theres the thing where you go round manically cheery just before dropping again but that isnt it, when you do get the good days enjoy them, dont look for the pitfall and try to see how and why things are better and then see if you can keep those good days going.

 

[Jade-]

instead of analyzing what is wrong, and when the moods are going to set back in, you should actually be analyzing what went right, or what has made you feel good again. The difference is positive vs. negative thinking patterns. Think negatively, and you will convince yourself. Think positive, and you will be quite astonished by the power of your mind.

Good advice. When I do feel good I tend to start worrying how long it will last instead of just feeling good.

 

[Iam]

I agree Anthony. I have been feeling good for the last 5 days now. When I start getting anxious I remind myself of what it was that helped me over the hump to feeling better. It has helped tremendously.

I do have a question however....and since you have been dealing with this for so much longer than I have maybe you or someone else can help me out on it. I have felt good this week by not only remembering what helped me feel better, but also in refusing to go back into the emotional processing. A good thing except.......I will be going to my next therapy session on Tuesday as usual. There I will be processing the past traumas again, this time a new one. There are so many traumas that it will take time to work thru them. Not that I will have to work thru each one, more like one from each category. So, more emotional processing....how do I stop that from affecting the feeling good that I am experiencing now?

 

[goingonhope]

My suggestion Iam is that you allow yourself to be. Show up for your therapy, continue living your life and deal with what is, while not anticipating any outcome whatsoever from additional emotional processing that's yet to have occurred.

You'll expend less energies not trying to control any situations and you'll be freer to continue on reeping rewards from trauma work which you've already done and processed.

Hope

 

[Iam]

Thanks Hope....I have to laugh about your comment about not trying to control any situations LOL! "Control" is my middle name and you can add to that "freak", haha! I do agree with you though. Unfortunately it is hard not to think about or anticipate it. I guess that's where "controlling" my thought patterns can be a plus ;o)

Actually, after I posted that I realized that my comfort came from the way in which we processed the specifics of an event in my session last Tuesday. That in itself is a comfort. I need to anticipate that my future sessions will bring that same sense of relief and comfort. Now that is positive thinking at it's best!

 

[blackpearl]

Let's hope that you got something changed, that it is about some positive input in your long term (is it called so?) memory, with other words, that it's more than just a little coffee break your brain is offering you. Keep on working.

 

[anni]

Iam, Believe me, I know there's that awful place where you just can't get back from with the anxiety. Had one just last week. It seems like they only 'stay' when there's just no rationalizing oneself OUT of there, if you know what I mean. It was recognizable, what Anthony said, because it FEELS like when your head has already 'been there' ( where you are now, feeling good ) it wants to go there, and will accept any sort of 'excuse' or reason to. Gosh I hope that makes sense since it's so conceptual.It just plain feels to me like once one's head KNOWS what it's like to be in that good place, it's somewhat easier to reclaim the peace-maybe because we know 'where' it is? Of course, if it all was as easy as it perhaps sounds we'd all be there allll the time. It's not, of course, but at least some sort of recognizable success in healing, probably?

I just started reading this since it sounded like a 'success story', and then mentioned other people helping one adjust. I SO detest having this stupid thing smeared all over my husband but he eventually figured out what on earth was up with me last week, maybe blinked once and made the adjustment which allowed me to work the heck out of there. Maybe next time I'll be wise enough to just ask him, instead of putting him through that and letting him have to figure it out. Oh- no-THAT paragraph wasn't for anyone in particular, just a general observation on the dynamics of what Anthony said.

 

[Jade-]

I'm afraid to just let myself feel good or have good days. In the back of my mind I think if I let down my guard or feel good I'm just setting myself up for disappointment. I think there will just be some major thing that will take over because I let my guard down, if that makes sense. Kind of like when I was a little girl, if I had fun and didn't watch my back, and didn't worry, that's when things happened the most and it was unexpected. (although things happened when I was anticipating it too)

I don't know how to just enjoy good days or good things without expecting the other shoe to drop. If I do have a good day, I know something is wrong and then I'm anxious waiting for what's to come. I don't know how to let go of this thinking. Anyone else think/feel this way? I really want to change my thinking but I don't know how.

 

[Iam]

I understand what you are saying Jade. Breaking old thought patterns is hard. It takes work, understanding ourselves, determination and discipline to change our wrong thinking. I was told by my past and my current T to "act as if I were happy", that eventually that in itself would change my emotions. I don't think it worked too well for me becasue I just shut my emotions off and processed everything on an intellectual level. I am not saying that CBT doesn't work....it most certainly does and is a necessary skill to learn.

My friend and I were just talking over lunch about the fact that having a positive experience in dealing with that one trauma should make it easier for me to deal with the others in a positive manner. I now have a positive starting point that resulted in a positive outcome in my memory. So experiencing a success in letting go and understanding why it worked for you will make it easier. Each success should bring a relief that will give us more and more positive days.

I think breaking the patterns may require different techniques for different people. Because of my "faith" (which is or has been almost nonexistant over the last 8 years) handing my trauma over to Jesus made a huge difference to me last Tuesday. That certainly wouldn't work for someone who doesn't believe in Him.

Once you find a technique that works for you Jade, you should be able to repeat it. Then you can feed your mind with the positive experience instead of the negative tapes that keep replaying. You'll find it Jade, just keep working at it. You will find it.