Feeling The Bad Feelings: How?

[NightSky]

@NightSky...absolutely, the best we can do is small steps. I have trigger issues...

Same here regarding not wanting my husband to feel rejected. It's so hard.
Yes, my therapist is very good at recognizing the instant I dissociate. She will ask if I'm with her. I always say yes even if I'm not. And if she knows I'm not she will ask me to name some things in the room or do to some breathing, whatever we can. I was also embarassed by it early on but now I'm so grateful. It means I don't go through session after session not remembering what happened. I've been working hard at stopping it as soon as it starts so I can transfer that over to other relationships. Now I don't get floaty and foggy as much, but emotions stay locked up when I'm with her. I walk into her office and I click into the persona that has it all together, likes to make her laugh, is smart, etc. I don't cry much and definitely not in front of people. So I have no question if I were to shed any tears with her it would be a struggle to stay present. So hard.

 

[amosmorris]

Same here regarding not wanting my husband to feel rejected. It's so hard.
Yes, my therapist is very...

Gotcha, totally. :hug:

 

[Freedomfighter]

I have been in therapy now for about 18 months, working with a therapist who is really wonderful. Ev...

Well, I am happy to report that none of my abusers have been able to make me be repulsed by myself. Thankfully I never have had that difficulty because I know that I am a beautiful person, so since I know that there is nothing that can be done to tell me otherwise, even though you would not believe at what stupid attempts there have been that said otherwise.
I look at people every day who have no life whatsoever, who mess up every single day, are into drugs, questionable sexual behaviorisms, and outright aggression towards people that personify truth and pride. Oh what a tough road a victim has to walk when going against pedophiles. I know women who have partaken in joining others that have stalked me and I know women who keep a calendar for their male clients, who in turn also "babysit" innocent little children who do not know that a pedophile is grooming them. It is so absolutely unbelievable that I do not even bother anymore to tell anyone.