Fight Or Flight? No Freeze?!

[matthios]

I don't think freezing is anything to do with the nature of the assault in itself (sexual or non-sexual).

In a lot of self-defense literature, it's indicated that the nature of the assault WILL often dictate fight vs flight vs freeze. This is not looking at sexual assaults, only non-sexual "violent assault." Marc MacYoung (i think is his name) discusses this a bit.

One of the things posited is that the "freeze" response is often triggered/exacerbated/lenghtened because we, as an entire race of humanity, are not accustomed to letting the "lizard brain" kick in as often as we were when regularly threatened by (non-human) predators. We spend longer in freeze-mode while giving up control to the lizard brain necessary for survival. It's been posited this delay in "switching gears" may be related to the "blackout" that so many experience (rather than pure psychological dissociation)

My experience of fight/flight/freeze is that they're overwhelming and there's no conscious choice at all.

Absolutely! It just seems like the lizard brain may be a bit more sophisticated and astute in decoding threats than we generally give it credit for...

ROCK ON LIZARD BRAIN!

 

[Abstract]

Well sadly I actually even freeze sometimes when I get an email or text from a close friend. I am afraid of intimacy. I seem to be stuck in freeze mode in my life. So although I think that originally we can blame this on the lizard brain I do think that when it becomes the go-to response that it is more than that. It is maybe the combination of the lizard brain and personality or personal history and the personalities or responses of the abusers. Freeze can become habitual. Whereas others with different personality types or history may be stuck in fight. Maybe it does vary a lot depending on if it is complex trauma or childhood trauma too.

Freeze may have been the correct and most helpful response for me as a child but sadly it has put me in danger later in my life when fight might have saved me.

 

[KatB]

Skimming through the posts, I see a lot of my reactions to my traumas- most likely, a combination of all three. I don't know if screaming and yelling is considered fight, but that would be a reaction that comes out of the blue,naturally. I've experienced all three. All three which makes me question: are we wired to react differently to different traumas or situations?

All reactions are overwhelming to me. They happen suddenly and we have no control over them. Unfortunately, that's not the same for survivors/victims of traumas. " survivor's guilt" is far too real for me. Always wondering if my reactions were reasonable or right or if they were meant to come out that way. Nothing more than questions everyday. Non-stop. every day.:speechless:

 

[AS1975]

One thing I've noticed, that may or may not help others deal with their response to trauma, is that regardless of your reaction, if you lived you are in front of the game. I've had to go to counseling for multiple traumas, there is one inevitable positive outcome that is common to all the ones I had to discuss - I lived, I learned, I made it.

One other thing, there seems to be a lot of guilt coming out from those who froze or fled, trust me on this, if you run at danger like a bull at a gate and put yourself in greater danger than you otherwise would have, there is still guilt, it may be different, but it is still there. It isn't so much what we do when faced with trauma that scars us, it is the fact we were faced with a traumatic event and lived (one would hope they don't haunt us if we don't survive - one day I'm sure I'll find out).

 

[saffy]

My reaction was to freeze in absolute terror

I think this is important to understand, thank for bringing it up.

I always like think that in a situation of fear I would run or fight my way out, In reality I would probably freeze. I think If I freeze and stay still and quiet they will end it quicker and go away, like playing dead I suppose.

Our biological body responses can vary in times of fear though so can be very unpredictable and as much as we can train to help ourselves in times of threat, It still does not prepare you totally when it happens as your fear responses are involuntary . You have no time to think about what to do rationally so our self survival system kicks in and acts for us and we cannot control that.

The flight, flight or freeze response is governed by our autonomic nervous system.

https://docs.google.com/viewer?a=v&...ASig9Y&sig=AHIEtbQHJm99cZV35Le-BCnF5JJUhbNq8Q

This a very good scholary article about it. I found it very interesting so I hope it helps. :)

best wishes
Saffy :)

 

[Britt.f7]

When I was attacked in Jr. High, I fought back. Didn't do me much good but I did.

Still in Jr. high, a troubled friend of mine and his friend pinned me down and he started to undo my pants. I froze, even though my sister was in the other room. Thankfully his friend must have saw the look in my eyes because he made my troubled friend stop.

 

[AS1975]

Yet my point is that we lived through whatever situation we may feel guilt over our response, but the fact we have that opportunity means we made it. It is no mean feat, nor is it something to be sneezed at, it means our respective survival instincts worked.

 

[Violet03]

Like so many others mentioned I froze as well. I have immense guilt over this. I don't know if it was a life-long pattern ingrained in me from childhood SA or just my reaction. Either way, it adds to my guilt. Especially when I hear other people say I wanted it.

 

[Britt.f7]

Violet03, I hope you asked those people if they were idiots. Only ignorant people would say anything like that. It gets so frustrating. The abusers should take responsibility and people should put the blame where it belongs and that isn't on the victim.

There isn't any "right" way to react to a traumatic experience. Everyone reacts differently. And freezing doesn't mean you wanted any of it.

 

[saffy]

Like so many others mentioned I froze as well. I have immense guilt over this

I think guilt is the worse thing. Please remember, and to say to these people, that you could not control your response. Freezing is involuntary, you cannot of controlled it even if you wanted to. It is a survival mode of the body, to put it simply, the body decides in a split second whether you are better of fleeing or fighting and if not you freeze, the same as your heart decided to beat faster in response to the fright, you cannot control that either.

If people tell you that you wanted it, I pray it never happens to them, they have no idea what you went through as I assume they have never been through it themselves. People like this should be dismissed immediately due to complete ignorance and lack of compassion, (aren't they the ones who should be feeling guilty?).

Learning to forgive yourself is a big concern and hard to do in the face of such an experience and aftemath. Every journey starts with just one step forward and yours should be to not blame yourself you are a victim, you certainly did not want it!! If you did you would not feel like this.

hugs
Saffy :)

 

[KP the nut]

My trauma was different, I was an a car crash and I froze. I couldn't move, I was scared to move and I didn't let go of the steering wheel until someone spoke to me.

During EMDR, we worked on those feelings and I remembered I had to physically lift my right hand off the steering wheel with my left hand. Just writing about it brings sickness to my stomach all over again.