BlueBerry6999
Bronze Member
I'm not even sure what I expect from posting this, but I guess I just need to write it down to wrap my own head around it.
After a bit more than four years of therapy, I have finally gotten mostly over my PTSD. I've never been as happy as this year, things have been going great and now I'm expecting a baby.
My husband wanted a last vacation before the daddy-duties start. As a passionate scuba diver, he booked a boat safari in Egypt.
Maybe you already know what happened next if you've been following the news. Anyway, he ended up on that boat which sank on November 25th.
11 people are probably dead, including his roommate. "Luckily" he didn't know his roommate prior to the trip and he went on the trip alone, but I feel like he's blaming himself for not trying to save him.
Me, I'm glad he didn't because chances are very high that he would not have made it home if he had wasted time trying to save his roommate, who might have hit his head when the boat was hit by the huge wave. Apparently he was alive at first, but it was pitch-black in the cabin. My husband says his roommate replied to him when he called for him, but his reply sounded dull in a way, like he was barely conscious.
Then in a matter of only seconds, the window burst and water flooded their cabin.
My husband told me he kind of accepted dying in that moment, but then he thought of me and our baby and forced himself to swim out through the window against the current, cutting his legs open in the process.
He then managed to get on a safety raft, but they got separated from the boat and floated in the sea for about 8hours, everyone freezing, and vomiting because of the waves. They didn't have any water. Luckily they were found by rescuers at around midday.
All of this just sounds too horrible to be true and makes it all kind of surreal. When I heard that the boat had sunk, my imagination was much less horrible than what my husband ended up telling me.
Thanks to my own experience with PTSD, I know the signs and dos and don'ts. I can say that my husband is doing a great job with all of this. He's very tough, but he's still visibly shaken. He has flashbacks where a sudden dizziness overcomes him. He says it feels like the boat shaking in the storm. He's been sleeping well so far, he's been needing much more sleep than usual, but he hasn't had intense nightmares so far, although he does have stressful dreams once in a while. He's been very open about what happened and he seems to know his own limits quite well. He's already gone back to work today, but then he texted me that he's not feeling well and will be going home early.
I've booked him an appointment with my trauma therapist (ironically I ended my therapy one week before he went on vacation) and I hope he will continue seeing a therapist. He usually thinks he's tough enough to deal with everything on his own, but with our baby due in fifteen weeks, he really needs to tackle this whole thing now rather than later.
I also don't know if all of this will have a retraumatizing effect on me. Despite not having been there, I have this movie playing in my head based on what he told me. Last night I dreamed of the titanic sinking for some reason.
I also don't know if he should talk to the media or not. Is there any benefit for one's mental health doing this, sharing one's story publicly, or would it rather have the opposite effect?
They've already tried to get in touch with his family, and I suppose it's only a matter of time until they contact him, now that he's back home.
The thing is, he's already been in several videos spread by the media. His uncle actually recognized him that way. I just feel like this whole thing might cause more potential triggers, with the risk of people recognizing him and mentioning what happened.
Does anybody here have experience with public disasters like this and how best to handle them?
After a bit more than four years of therapy, I have finally gotten mostly over my PTSD. I've never been as happy as this year, things have been going great and now I'm expecting a baby.
My husband wanted a last vacation before the daddy-duties start. As a passionate scuba diver, he booked a boat safari in Egypt.
Maybe you already know what happened next if you've been following the news. Anyway, he ended up on that boat which sank on November 25th.
11 people are probably dead, including his roommate. "Luckily" he didn't know his roommate prior to the trip and he went on the trip alone, but I feel like he's blaming himself for not trying to save him.
Me, I'm glad he didn't because chances are very high that he would not have made it home if he had wasted time trying to save his roommate, who might have hit his head when the boat was hit by the huge wave. Apparently he was alive at first, but it was pitch-black in the cabin. My husband says his roommate replied to him when he called for him, but his reply sounded dull in a way, like he was barely conscious.
Then in a matter of only seconds, the window burst and water flooded their cabin.
My husband told me he kind of accepted dying in that moment, but then he thought of me and our baby and forced himself to swim out through the window against the current, cutting his legs open in the process.
He then managed to get on a safety raft, but they got separated from the boat and floated in the sea for about 8hours, everyone freezing, and vomiting because of the waves. They didn't have any water. Luckily they were found by rescuers at around midday.
All of this just sounds too horrible to be true and makes it all kind of surreal. When I heard that the boat had sunk, my imagination was much less horrible than what my husband ended up telling me.
Thanks to my own experience with PTSD, I know the signs and dos and don'ts. I can say that my husband is doing a great job with all of this. He's very tough, but he's still visibly shaken. He has flashbacks where a sudden dizziness overcomes him. He says it feels like the boat shaking in the storm. He's been sleeping well so far, he's been needing much more sleep than usual, but he hasn't had intense nightmares so far, although he does have stressful dreams once in a while. He's been very open about what happened and he seems to know his own limits quite well. He's already gone back to work today, but then he texted me that he's not feeling well and will be going home early.
I've booked him an appointment with my trauma therapist (ironically I ended my therapy one week before he went on vacation) and I hope he will continue seeing a therapist. He usually thinks he's tough enough to deal with everything on his own, but with our baby due in fifteen weeks, he really needs to tackle this whole thing now rather than later.
I also don't know if all of this will have a retraumatizing effect on me. Despite not having been there, I have this movie playing in my head based on what he told me. Last night I dreamed of the titanic sinking for some reason.
I also don't know if he should talk to the media or not. Is there any benefit for one's mental health doing this, sharing one's story publicly, or would it rather have the opposite effect?
They've already tried to get in touch with his family, and I suppose it's only a matter of time until they contact him, now that he's back home.
The thing is, he's already been in several videos spread by the media. His uncle actually recognized him that way. I just feel like this whole thing might cause more potential triggers, with the risk of people recognizing him and mentioning what happened.
Does anybody here have experience with public disasters like this and how best to handle them?
