Getting Beyond Coping

[LoveHimThroughIt]

I agree with what you are saying in that I need to keep trying. I do. It just always ends the same w...

You're allowed to have rough nights. I'm sorry you're feeling bad. I was told that the best thing to do is to feel the sadness, acknowledge it and then let it go - release it. I don't know if that helps you, but I hope it does. I spent all day Monday crying my eyes out like a baby because I can do absolutely nothing for my sufferer. He's in full on isolation mode. I flew to visit him and he is triggered and in isolation. I am in a hotel and he is 15 minutes away and I cannot do anything. He doesn't want me to. So I cried for hours, but when I was done, I got a sense of calm. It was like I had purged out all of the negative at that time. I'm sure it will come back again, but for now, I'm ok.

So, I spent all day Monday thinking the worst of everything and second guessing myself and him and everything. When you're having a bad day, it is hard to find a silver lining. What I'm trying to say is that you don't need to change. I'm not all that likeable either. I have no filter and most people find that I talk too much and I'm blunt. I have 5 people I would consider to be my friends and they're all oddballs like me. We're not social. We do our own thing. Instead of thinking that there is something wrong with you and that you need to change, why not just try to find someone else who is like you? I'm just offering my opinion. You are the only person who knows what is best for you.

I like your new profile pic/avatar BTW. The Triskele. Very symbolic. It has many different interpretations, but the one I like, especially for you, is "a tale of forward motion to reach understanding." You're on the path, just keep putting one foot in front of the other. I hope you have a better night.

 

[torietoo]

Hi again! Tryingtofly I would love to ask you if you will take a chance with me and be buddies. The best of friends are the ones that it feels wonderful to be "negative " with and to celebrate being "negative ". I don't believe in such a thing anyway. It's just another way to feel bad about our emotions which are supposedly not bad. I'm a beginner of my frozen emotions are starting to thaw so I don't really know what's up from down. You know what? Screw the whole idea of not being negative. I want to express how I really feel and not worry if I'm too "negative " or too "positive ". Dumb labels. No wonder we are so confused:) I am 41 years old and I have tons to "complain" about so I hope you will accept my invitation but only when you feel okay about it and listen to yourself and how your body reacts and you will know the answer so at least this once, trust yourself. Yourself may not feel like you're up to it ir it's just too much, I'm with ya! Please take care this evening:)

 

[tryingtofly]

You're allowed to have rough nights. I'm sorry you're feeling bad. I was told that the best t...

I really appreciate you sharing your point of view. Having someones else perspective on things is very helpful. I think having no one to bounce things off of , or to validate, I am in fact likable, is why I feel the way I do about myself.

I had a mother who embedded into my mind throughout my whole life that I am not, an never will be good enough for anyone. Then I married a man who has spent over 20 years reinforcing those same ideals, that I am not good enough. So it is very hard for me to see any good in myself.

Take a forty something yo introvert with the heart and persona of a goofy, outgoing, flighty teenager who knows no boundaries, a depressive disorder, anxiety disorder and just so there is never a dull moment, Ptsd, and that's me :) . I am very complicated to say the least and, so is my life. Don't know if I'm coming or going half the time. lol :)

I am really sorry to hear about your sufferer. I can only imagine how hard all of this is on you. He is so lucky to have such a caring and supportive person like you at his side. Having a good cry dose help clear the heart, mind, and soul. Makes way for new possibilities and for us to move forward. I know you want to be there for your sufferer, but please don't forget to take care of you. You sound like a very sweet and caring person, and it has been very nice chatting with you.

The Triskele is very important to me. I have a tattoo of one :) . Constant reminder to keep moving and growing in every way possible, mind, heart, body and soul.

I hope today has been a good one for you, will keep you and your sufferer in my thoughts., Wishing you peace, love and much happiness.

 

[tryingtofly]

Hi again! Tryingtofly I would love to ask you if you will take a chance with me and be buddies. The bes...

Sounds good to me.. feel free to message me if you would like. I am a good listener :) . Hope your day is going well :)

 

[The Albatross]

What can you think of to give you moments of peace and calm? That's where I started. Instead of feeling like a poser and performing like a trained seal. I think I'd start to set apart some time to cultivate, learn about, get some peace and calm.

 

[Friday]

Also , yesterday I was reading some of the post on here and ended up having a full blown panic attack. While I understand I was triggered by what I was reading, what I don't understand is how one is to get better when everything sends them into panic mode. Weather it be reading or talking to a therapist. In the end I feel like my only chance of survival is to " AVOID ". I know that is not healthy in any way what so ever and will not solve my issues but I honestly do not know what else to do at this time.

Try reading these:

Reading Forum Increases Symptoms!

Link Removed

 

[The Albatross]

Welcome trying to fly... flying not the difficulty for me... being grounded is. It can happen. Honest and welcome.

 

[tryingtofly]

What can you think of to give you moments of peace and calm? That's where I started. Instead of f...

Thank you for the suggestions.

 

[The Albatross]

Echoes from Pink Floyd was one of my earliest senses of some peace and calm but you can think of others that are relatable no doubt. Cultivating a daily sense of peace and calm... as a starting point, mid point, end point is critical for your general well being. A good habit to cultivate?

 

[The Albatross]

I have an almost automatic affinity for people aspiring to defy gravity or who wear feathers. Heh.

 

[tryingtofly]

Welcome trying to fly... flying not the difficulty for me... being grounded is. It can happen. Ho...

I want to fly away from the prison I feel like I'm in. Past two days have been bad, not able to keep my feet on the ground no matter what I try. Thank you for the welcome

 

[The Albatross]

Well that's a hell of a motivation... hold that thought and you're among peers... a broad spectrum.