Hey Mince Pie,
I understand trying to keep it all together - denial is a powerful thing. Like me, you know that you can't run from yourself, that at some point you will need to seek treatment, counselling and yes - medications. Pride is a big thing, but it is essential you get some sleep, and replenish your neurotransmitters. In some ways, this is like diabetes - not enough or too much insulin and you habe trouble. The same is true of serotonin.