Guinea Pig Purchasing Emergency

[angel2write]

This is stupid. I just need to whine.

I went to the pet store today. To buy fish. For my six-yearold's birthday.

My daughter saw some baby guinea pigs. She has saved up over $100 of babysitting money & wanted to buy a guinea pig "friend" for her guinea pig.

The store couldn't guarantee what sex they were. I wanted to try and sex them as I had seen the vet do it & knew how.

Picked up little baby piggy pig and was trying to get his penis to extend (genitals not fully formed yet- very young). I thought the first was female. Second male. I was WRONG. All male.

Then store person told me I was holding guinea pig wrong. That I would break it's back. But I was not. Very careful. Small animal, very careful. I know how to hold little guinea pigs. I didn't hurt it. Wouldn't hurt it.

I got lost, went numb... then started yelling at myself in the car & in the grocery. Panic attack I guess. Rushing in my ears. Every time I felt the little furry body in my hand again I started yelling again. My poor kids had to lead me through the store. I was hitting myself in the check out line and jerking like someone was slapping me in the face.

Is this EVER GOING TO BE OVER???

I feel so stupid and miserable and useless I just want to gut myself. Over a GUINEA PIG. WHY do I do this???

 

[Meadowsweet]

(((Angel2write))) I'd be upset if someone said that to me. Be gentle on yourself.

 

[NIKI]

Of course you wouldn't hurt the little animal. They don't know you. Your a good person.

 

[Heather]

(((((Angel)))))) You are a good, strong and capable person. Take a deep breath and remember that.

Lots of love. Heather

 

[Kintsugi]

Dear Angel, I have a friend who loves animals but is short on degrees, so he took several pet store jobs. He quickly found all his co-workers to be totally animal incompetent and totally uncaring. After going through this loop of realizations a few times, he has now sworn off working at pet stores due to the rampant lack of care. In short, I A) seriously doubt you were hurting the animal; I know the stance you were describing and it's not harmful and B) the employee was probably a teaspoon more qualified than your kids in the caring of animals. C) you were a customer, and if the employee was having a serious problem with your small animal abilities, s/he could have gotten someone else to help you, demonstrated how they were trained, or basically said ANYTHING besides what s/he did in front of your kids!

I feel for you (((Angel))).

And my two cents: get a pet rat instead. My best friend's guinea pig and my rat got along swimmingly, and rats are purely indestructible anyway. :D

 

[KP the nut]

(((Angel))) I'm sorry. I know you wouldn't hurt a living thing. From my limited experience of small furries, it would soon have let you know if it were in pain or uncomfortable.

(((HUGS))) to your kids for helping you.

 

[Srain]

Angel, I may be way off base here but my take on this was the whole idea of somebody telling you that you are just doing it "WRONG" when you know what you are doing and not listening to you could be the trigger. I didn't get that it was really about the guinea pig at all but more about not being heard, however that could just be my trigger rearing it's ugly head. You being treated like a child and being disrespected in that way from an over-reactive adult would be enough to trigger me off.

Either way, I get it and can understand the frustration of your reacting so strongly back. I'm sorry you were triggered and I'm glad that you know coming here you are safe.

(((((((((((((((((Angel)))))))))))))))
peace and healing,
Rain

 

[maddog]

Really enormous, heartfelt hugs to you Angel. I'm so sorry for your distress and humiliation and panic and regret. I wish there was more to say, but i know you know the truth of this matter, the truth being that you are a good and kind person, a knowledgeable animal handler and someone who is just trying to do the best they can to make it through the world and take care of everyone in your life, 2 and 4-legged.

Try really really hard not to bash yourself about this. It's over, it's done, and you're safe and ok now, and that's all you can control after the fact.

I wish this hadn't happened. I'm glad your kids were with you. I'm sorry it's so unfair.

Maddog

 

[angel2write]

Angel, I may be way off base here but my take on this was the whole idea of somebody telling you that you are just doing it "WRONG" when you know what you are doing and not listening to you could be the trigger.

That, and the fact that I was wrong about the sex, I guess. So ashamed. Because they let me have permission to hold it, then when I got the sex wrong, it was like, they regretted even letting me pick it up. Like I was stupid and not to be trusted. And I was so ashamed.

Just another shame trigger I guess.

Sorry- I didn't get an alert from people posting on here and it was really nice to read everybody's comments today. I just got out of another pet-related flashback and I'm feeling exhausted. :notworthy:

This helped make me feel better. Thanks.

 

[Srain]

((((((((((((((Angel2)))))))))))))))
I'm so very sorry you went through this.

Thinking of you,
Rain

 

[maddog]

So sorry Angel, I know those shame triggers, and they are truly horrible, and their effects seem to last so very long.

Hope you're trucking better soon.

Maddog

 

[Belle]

And my two cents: get a pet rat instead. My best friend's guinea pig and my rat got along swimmingly, and rats are purely indestructible anyway. :D

Ah that image is amazing:Drats are cute imo

That, and the fact that I was wrong about the sex, I guess. So ashamed. Because they let me have permission to hold it, then when I got the sex wrong, it was like, they regretted even letting me pick it up. Like I was stupid and not to be trusted. And I was so ashamed.

They (shop assistants) sound pretty dumb, errr triggers ((((((hugs))))), I hate being 'shamed'