Gyn exams

[expectingbetter]

Is anyone avoiding for years going to gynecological exams just for regular check up?
How do you deal with shame you didn't go for so long.
Or with fear that something might be wrong and you are missing it?
And how do you make yourself going if you had fear of it, like I do, for many reasons.

Thanks.

 

[EveHarrington]

I’m notorious for putting off....everything.

I find that if I can turn it into a lighthearted joke, it takes away any tension.

Like....

“Oh, where has the time gone!? I should have made this appointment ages ago” (lighthearted laugh)

Because.....the truth is......that people in any profession know that many people out there don’t stick to regular schedules whether it be for getting your oil changed, getting doctors check ups.....or anything, really.

 

[Gs172003]

I had an issue and had no choice. Turned out to be nothing but I had to tell the doctor that I have issues and she accommodated. I made sure to go to a woman too.

 

[bellbird]

Is anyone avoiding for years going to gynecological exams just for regular check up?

Yes, I was actually just thinking about this this morning. I've been avoiding mine for ages because I feel I just don't have the emotional strength right now to cope with what will probably be really triggering. But feeling a lot of shame and fear as a result.
The two ideas I had come up with to help make it easier for myself were the same as @Zoogal mentioned: woman doctor/nurse, and letting them know my hesitations so that they can be more accommodating.

 

[Gs172003]

I actually went to a nurse practitioner. She was absolutely great. She called me herself to give me the results too.

 

[frogthroat]

I've only been to an ob-gyn twice and I have to be put under for mine so it's expensive. I figure if I get cervical cancer I'll just die. I don't ever plan on ever going back to one but that's my choice.
Be aware that most of them "accomadate" your issues with penetration with multiple appointments to try to examine you and then it becomes an inpatient procedure.

 

[Gs172003]

I've only been to an ob-gyn twice and I have to be put under for mine so it's expensive. I figure if...

Mine accommodated me by allowing me to do whatever I needed to do to calm myself (I listened to music) and did the pap smear as quickly as possible. Im not going to lie it still sucked. She then talked me down after. When it came time for the breast exam she asked permission and was talking me through it. That part wasn't as bad.

 

[expectingbetter]

I just don't have the emotional strength

Me too, but I seem I constantly don't have it. It's just so much hard that I never feel well enough to even try to deal with it. There's never enough strength left for such 'minor' thing.

I agree that it's obligatory the woman doctor, but they can be real bitches very often.

@frogthroat you scared me even a bit more with your view of the situation. I am sorry you are feeling that way. I am one step to the point to feel the same like you and say the same thing :notworthy:, unfortuntely.

 

[frogthroat]

Me too, but I seem I constantly don't have it. It's just so much hard that I never feel well en...

I'm sorry. I shouldn't have replied to this thread right now. For every woman that has a negative experience with an ob-gyn there's another one that has a good experience. Half of my unease is my own personal distrust of ANYONE especially authority figures. I dissociate and I'm not the best patient either. I get to where I can't answer questions. Of, course I didn't look for one that is trained with trauma survivors or accommodate them. I just waited until I had a near emergency and went. Please don't let what I said affect you. I'm very salty right now.

 

[expectingbetter]

Half of my unease is my own personal distrust of ANYONE especially authority figures.

Exactly same I could write myself!

Don't feel bad about what you shared, it's how you feel, it's ok, it is not going to affect me in a negative way, I am already scared as much as possible, I guess talking with you people could only help.

 

[Sideways]

I found a lump in my ladybits in January. Dang!

I spoke to my pdoc about whether that was something I could afford to ignore? No. Double Dang.

So I went to a lady GP and she gave me a referral for anl gyno. That’s a problem (putting it mildly). I negotiated.

We agreed to do a blood test and a pap smear, and get a ultrasound instead of going straight for the gyno-hell. And essentially, she was incredibly patient and let me cry and shake my way through the smear and I had my mum drive me to and from the appointment.

The referral for the USS is still sitting on my counter. Can’t. Just can’t. But since the bloods are normal, and the smear was normal? I’ve talked myself into simply giving it a few more months to plan the appointment and the support I’ll need before, during and after.

I think maybe the only way round this? Is to go straight through it. So I’m trying to balance the need for planning and self-care with making sure I do, ultimately, get it checked out in a reasonable time. My pdoc will probably hospitalise me in the trauma ward for support for the week, because there’s really no way of avoiding the fact that yes, it’s incredibly distressing, but yes, it also needs to be done.

 

[expectingbetter]

@Sideways that scenario is my nightmare :bag:. I am so sorry you are going through this. I wish you good luck!