Had My First Therapy Session Today.

[Kas_Can_Fly]

Today I had the first therapy session, I should point out that this is my first time trying/in therapy, which is why I have such a clueless query. Obviously I didn't expect the therapy to start at my earliest memory and work through to the present day addressing issues along the way. Nor did I expect to address my traumas so linearly. But I expect the session to have some purpose, some direction.

I feel like I don't know what to expect from therapy - I have a broad overall treatment plan, but how does a session go? Am I supposed to know what to talk about when I get there? Is it just because it's the beginning it felt so aimless and/or will it always be like that? It was neither personal nor impersonal, good or bad, helpful or not helpful. It's rather confusing. I hope it will in time build a flow but it felt awkward and jarring, not horrible, just odd and purposeless. Ok - the big picture has a purpose, but I don't know how we get from individual sessions to that big picture. Time will tell? Confused!!

 

[piratelady]

In my experience the first session (sometimes 2) is more about getting to know you. Understanding some of your history, what you are looking for help with. It's sort of an interview. My first session with each of the therapists I've seen were more about getting to know me and providing me an opportunity to ask questions of the therapist.

After that, I think it tends to vary. It's my understanding (although I don't know from experience) that if you were getting CBT, those sessions seem to be rather structured. I don't really know what to call the type of therapy I get, but each week I go in and we spend maybe 5ish minutes talking about what happened in the previous week. Then if something warrants further discussion we delve into that. If nothing of substance has happened we talk more about trauma and start working through that.

I don't know if this helped at all?

 

[radicalgratitude]

Hello, and congrats on starting therapy! That takes a lot of strength and courage! :tup: The first therapy session is always an intake. Depending on how extensive your trauma history is, it can take more than a session to finish the intake, but the therapist does his/her best to get it done in one day. I personally think the intake is the hardest part about counseling because it brings everything to the surface without a chance to process it.

No, an intake is not therapy. It is a chance for the therapist to get to know you better, what you have been through, and what you would like to work on (your goals for treatment). From there, the therapist will decide how s/he can best help you.

While you are attending therapy, you can also be figuring out if your therapist is a good fit for you. Finding a therapist is like trying on jeans. There are so many to pick from, but you only want to buy the one that has the perfect fit. Pay attention to how easily you can talk to your therapist, because your therapist is someone you can tell things you wouldn't even tell your best friend. There is going to be vulnerability, so keep that in mind.

As far as knowing what to talk about, your therapist can guide you with some introductory questions, but I always like to come with some idea. I think back on the last week and I think of what memories/issues have bothered me the most.

A word of caution that I learned the hard way: There have been times when I was having a really good day (after a few bad days). So I presented well at my therapy session, was very positive throughout it, and then the next day I would feel awful and need to call my therapist. That's why its important to look at how you have felt since the last time you had your last session and not how you have felt in the last 3 hours. Moods go up and down, and therapy is the time to address when they are down. Hope this makes sense.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

Just to be clear, I'd already had an assessment a fortnight previously, this was my first actual session. My main sort of concern is I imagined my therapist to talk a little back to me, but when I stopped talking the room was filled with an awkward silence that didn't really go until I started stuttering "so yeah, sorry, but, yeah, that's what I err, sorry" until she finally interrupted or until I got so anxious I started waffling about nothing, until I found something else of any use to say.

Thank you Pirate Lady, that was helpful, I suppose a different question would be, how much does a therapist involve his/herself in the therapy, are they there only to listen, or there to sort of guide therapy. I suppose I imagined her to have a little more to say, but then because I was so nervous, I was waffling about things that don't really concern me that much to pass the awkward silences and it was of little substance, so she probably didn't have anything to say. But now I feel like I wasted the session, I only have 48 and I don't want to jeopardise my chance at making it work but always waffling nervously. Can someone do therapy wrong?

Thanks Radicalgrattitude, in my assessment we touched on the fact that I have trauma, but I am not capable of saying what they were because I can bring myself to say the words and because I can't tell anyone before I build some trust there, I know I have to tell here, but she will the first person I will tell physically, as opposed to a letter or email etc. I can't seem to let the vulnerability show - which is one of the reasons I need the therapy, because I'm becoming more and more aware that I'm deceiving even myself within certain boundaries and pretending I'm ok or playing the strong part, when I'm not OK, practically ever.

 

[piratelady]

how much does a therapist involve his/herself in the therapy, are they there only to listen, or there to sort of guide therapy.

I think it varies from therapist to therapist. My first one said very little and I did the same thing in my appointments. I would ramble on about nothing because I was so nervous. The therapist I have now lets me talk but when I am done, he does ask questions and sort of guide therapy.

Can someone do therapy wrong?

No, I don't think you can do it wrong. I would tell your therapist that you would prefer them to sort of guide things more since you're not really sure what to say. See how they react and if they can accommodate that. I definitely understand not wanting to feel like you've wasted your appointments.