Has anyone moved cities/states/countries as a step towards recovery? how did it go?

[LanaD]

This is what you asked^^

....

If you need advise regarding escaping political persecution there...

You quote from a post that was made 1 month ago and another that was made 1 day ago. Also physical aggression and political persecution are completely different things (the latter may involve the former but not necessarily), so not sure what your post is even about. But for those following this thread:

Stepping outside the door in my home country has become a trigger because harassment has become a regular, excusable thing there. Given that situation, it seemed impossible to really tackle the PTSD because it was constantly re-activated, so I asked about others' experience for insight.

It has been a month since I posted my initial question. During this time I've read others' answers and have been assessing my state, asking myself questions and doing further research. I've been able to see that yes, the situation in my home country was contributing to the PTSD, or at least making that wound impossible to heal. I do still have work to do so yes, as someone mentioned the problems will follow me, but it has been refreshing to be able to consider issues separately and to see a light at the end of the tunnel - not living in fear on a daily basis will certainly help with the PTSD but will not be a cure all.

Now, it is still hard to think about the PTSD and all these thoughts are floating about in my head - they help me "see" and "realize" this and that, and that there are things to be worked out. On that note, I did notice something: there are a few disrespectful foreigners here, too, and dealing with one of these wastes of space the other day triggered me. It was not a good feeling and made me think that I can't be safe anywhere, and all of that has been clouding my thoughts and making me feel cornered again, though nowhere near as bad as back home. I'm giving myself some time to let all this settle so that I can asses the situation - which brings me to this: in Safeland I can give myself the time and space to assess the situation, whereas back home that would be impossible unless I never went outside.

Sorry if some things don't make sense. It's tough to think straight when talking PTSD.

 

[Mee]

You quote from a post that was made 1 month ago and another that was made 1 day ago. Also physical aggres...

Living in peace or creating contentment sounds healthy.

Your thread in fact intrigues me Because on a personal basis I have wondered why living in unrest was not triggering and ( while I would not choose it) potential trigger incidents exist as ok memories that made me believe I was a tough and resilient person.

What I will say is that moving for peace and safety is recognised as something that deserves amnesty; Something rare in an insensitive world, But what people say about not out running what's inside of us is true. In this case maybe moving for safety and emotional safety is a foundation ideally supported through therapy for the ptsd which will not disappear; when you become aware if crime in ’safeland’ close home for example, it might feel ’harder’ then when you are steeled for it or expecting it

 

[LanaD]

I have wondered why living in unrest was not triggering

Thanks for your comment! Have you come up with potential answers to that question? Everyone's different, of course, but it's interesting to see what works for different people. Btw, do you have a stable life otherwise (home, job etc)?

 

[EveHarrington]

Move knowing that you are moving to change your surroundings and external factors.....move knowing that you will be taking “you” with you.....move knowing that the former can indeed affect the latter, but changing the former won’t completely fix the latter.

Good luck!

 

[Mee]

Thanks for your comment! Have you come up with potential answers to that question? Everyone's d...

Yes. I cope with even very stressful ‘reality’ well. It’s draining, upsetting and emotional but it’s not something personal. My trigger incident involved personal betrayal where my intuition and crucially , a term I got here , moral injury. I think the idea that I had been so emotionally and personally vulnerable and not out of convenience as when a child, feeling targeted.

 

[Changing4Best]

I do not feel safe in my home country (heck, in my half of the darn continent!) and crap kept happening t...

625 miles and yes, it did. Not 100% relief, of course, but being away from the locality that it all happened in, that is priceless. Not running into my abuser ever again is a good feeling (even though a year and a half went by between when I had last seen him and when I ran into him again).

 

[LanaD]

a year and a half went by between when I had last seen him and when I ran into him again

How did that feel? How you did you handle it?

 

[Changing4Best]

Awful. I had thought I had ditched him, but no such luck. So I was only too glad to move away when the opportunity arose.

 

[Mee]

I can only imagine.

I am so terribly sorry you had to go through that.

 

[Lionheart]

I made a move to a smaller town from a bigger city and it turned out to be a step forward in my recovery because it left several bad elements outside of my reach. It wasn't intended but it was a happy result just the same.

 

[Sweetleaf]

I'm so afraid of my abuser.

If I move to a different city, will I stop being afraid of every f*cking noise being him, coming to get me?

Here it is an actual legitimate danger. He's free, he knows where I live, and has loads of reason to kill me, like he has threatened to countless times. I have a restraining order, but to someone who is suicidal and homicidal like that, that could mean nothing. He knows that I could get him put in prison, with what evidence I have.

I just want to change my name and move somewhere else.

There are reminders around town and stuff too, but honestly, it's my fear of him that is the worst part of living in this city.

I could actually move, once I put myself back together enough to be able to work again, full time. I have experience and qualifications that could let me teach or do other education related work in other towns in this state. I could go and move. Other towns are even cheaper, rent and property-wise. Plus, they're smaller and wont be as busy/hectic as this city - and they don't have my abuser in them.

It's so scary for me sometimes. Sometimes I have to outright just leave my house because I can't make myself stop feeling afraid.