Has Anyone Publicly Spoken About Their Trauma(s)?

[The Albatross]

I have to a degree. For application purposes (when I was teaching CPR/AED/First Aid)... I had no issue discussing some situations but it was limited and I only shared what was applicable to the teaching of the community level material.

 

[Panda Bear]

The presentation was amazing!

In all honesty, it was a long road from start to finish. When I first started writing it, it really stirred up a lot of emotions and things were more difficult. I struggled with an increase in symptoms for a few weeks before things settled down.

The week up to it? I had a heck of a time with dizziness and disassociation :(. That was rather embarrassing, normally I'm good at controlling it. The day before I spoke, I went back to see T. Just a precautionary tool, curled up into a ball and proclaimed that I wasn't going to speak. Cried and begged him to tell me I didn't need to.

No such luck. He wasn't having it and just le me have a quiet place to process my emotions and helped me get grounded. We prayed and talked about how this was the next step for me and I needed to follow through with it.

The day of...was hard and I was so anxious! But as soon as I laid my papers down on the podium and had a seat? All that went away. The long presentation that I had prepared went by the way side and I spoke from my heart for about 25min. From the sexual abuse, my dads suicide, my mom and dads abuse...all of it, the kids were very respective. A few times, I would glance out and see a few shocked faces and tears, but it was all good.

A number of my friends came to see it and that made it great!

But the best part? When it was all done, the kids took the opportunity to really open up and share about their struggles. For an about hour, they shared some big things!

Afterwards, the next day was tough for me. Total zombie and sleept a good 12hrs that night. I'm so glad that I did it, and I'll do it again, hands down.

The only really tough part is that I'm having some smaller nightmares and a lot of intrusive memories. Manageable, but still difficult.

 

[BoN-bOn]

I have to a isafeee. . For application purposes (when I was teaching CPR/AED/First Aid)... I had no...

I'm a nurse & for "application purposes...CPR, AED, first aid..." I wiuldbha

The presentation was amazing!

In all honesty, it was a long road from start to finish. When I first...

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The presentation was amazing!

In all honesty, it was a long road from start to finish. When I first...

Omg @Panda Bear how brave of you!!!!! So proud! I know how hard it is to put yourself out there & be vulnerable. & you did it!!!! Who knows how many lives you have saved just by sharing your own pain?! I know how hard that was for you....I've put myself out there as well. Be proud! Very proud!!!!

 

[physicist13]

I havn't, but I would like to. I would personally only choose to speak about it to strangers, since I am fairly private and wouldn't want most people I know knowing about my past.

That's very exciting for you though! Hope it goes well and that you enjoy it :)

 

[Panda Bear]

It's more than a week out from my presentation and I'm suffering a fair amount of increased symptoms. :(

Anxiety, brain fog, disassociation, nightmares, a lot of intrusive thoughts and memories. It's just been hard. I'm distant and just riding the waves of life, trying to get a hold of my emotions. They're riding pretty high and I cry at the drop of a hat.

My T was encouraging me to try and cope through this on my own. But, then it just sparked my fear of abandonment and I flipped out and thought the world was going to leave me. I feel so stupid and embarrassed. I'm going back on Tuesday just to check in, even if I start to feel better.

Not that I would change what I did, because I'm very happy with my choice. But next time, I'll schedule a post presentation visit with T. Not just one before hand....but after, too.

 

[Changing4Best]

I was in a lecture at the Senior Center about PTSD. I was among friends. I didn't go into much detail, but I did mention that I have PTSD and that it was due to childhood traumas. No one has treated me any differently than they did before my mentioning of this. I was the only person there who admitted to having it, even though we have a number of folks there who have been in the Military Service. I guess maybe none of them came home with PTSD, or maybe they did, but don't even know it. I know one guy who maybe acts a little like he may have it, but he is about 90 and I am betting that back when he was in the Service, and when he left the Service, no one talked about PTSD then. Shell Shock, maybe, but not PTSD.

 

[Deleted member 8714]

Congratulations on speaking Panda Bear.

I experienced a similar path and after affects.

When I spoke it was before my therapist's church because they supported his ministry. His church wanted to see how much my therapist's ministry helped people. My knees shook the whole time I stood at the podium. I would've loved to sit down instead of stand. Though maybe my body would have shook instead. Yikes! Anyway, I was DID at the time of my speaking and 7 years into therapy. (I stayed with him for 14 years total.) I talked about healing from my abuse. At the time, I had come to a place where I believed I was healed and so did my therapist. We later learned that my memories came in clumps, and that I appeared fully healed in between the clumps of memories. So at the time I wasn't fully healed, but my therapist and I thought I was. Complicated.

After the speech, I had a brief meltdown and with my therapist's help recovered quickly thus adding to the belief that I was "healed."

Many of the church members talked about their "issues" after I shared my healing with them. Several ended up in therapy soon after that. So it was a good thing that I told my story.

Little did I know at the time that my journey would go on for many more years before I stopped going to therapy.