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Has Replies On Here Triggered You?

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It's usually not the replies that set me off. It's usually me and my own thoughts and words. I've always said and done the wrong thing. I've always caused my own suffering (distorted thinking) So I tread lightly, get unsure. Delete. Rewrite. End in mess anyway. It's a hole by my own hand.

But you are certainly not alone, and not worthless.
 
yeah, happens to me in chat all the time. (why the f*ck did i say that? great f*cking job, L. sound...
Hey, I care :) (Maybe too much for my own good, I am starting to realize)

Thanks for the comment, you made me chuckle, even through the floods of tears :):tup:
 
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I just put all my thoughts out there, and hopefully at least one person will understand what I am saying. People mean well, and are simply voicing their opinions. Triggers are everywhere for me also..in words, sounds, smells, colors, tastes.. It's difficult to live with, I know. Being hypersensitive stinks. Your nerves will settle after a while.
 
Hey everyone. Thank you so much for your input and kind words. In all honesty the actual thread I typed up at the time felt okay to go ahead. I read it now with understanding and much clarity and get it now!
What I feel for deep in my heart is hurting others and making others feel they don't matter, or they felt I looked down on them on some way. Oh. My. God. Never do I feel this way around anyone. I just hate that it provoked so much anger and hurt in another person. I feel responsible and would somehow love to rectify my lack of understanding.
But here, lesson learned. It wasn't other members that made me feel all those feelings I am feeling now, this is down to my past, how I was brought up with sadistic family members and how they treated me, and when members commented back to that thread, I started to feel - Oh shit, I've did wrong, I've hurt people and basically made a total fool of myself, I didn't think it through, I wasn't prepared. . .aaarrrggghhh, then bang, childhood trigger and then :cry: with a massive panic attack just to stir things up even more!

I genuinely do care about other people's feelings. I really do. I know how painful it is to hurt and be mistreated, unloved, not valued, etc. . . and I would hate it in myself if I ever made another fellow human being feel that way! I hope this thread somehow reaches the ones that have been offended, to see that I am taking full responsibility and owning up to my mistake that I didn't really think that thread through, I hope it dies off and the thread goes to bed. But I certainly meant no malice, no disregard for anyone's feelings at all. All I want to do is make amends :hug:
 
Hey everyone. Thank you so much for your input and kind words. In all honesty the actual thread I type...
You didn't hurt anyone. You were simply voicing your opinion, which is your right to do. Everyone's mind is different, and, often depending on their current mood and mindset, individuals can and will interpret your words in different ways. Everything is okay, no apologies necessary. ;)
 
@Whispering_Truth it isn't really an apology, it is more of an admission I was wrong and I truly understand why I provoked offence. And these offended members didn't hurt me, it was me feeling I have did wrong to them, not checking out the facts kind of thing and being a bit careless with my words!
All they did was trigger very old childhood feelings within me, but in a way I am glad. They needed to come up, they needed to be exposed and shed light on the darkness I have hidden away for so long. I learn today that I never dealt with my past pain, I just got really good at hiding it!

Thanks for your kindness though, I love your replies and your outlook on things. I do wish I had your 'THIS IS ME' like it or lump it attitude, my partner is similar and I have so much envy for you guys :laugh: but here, maybe one day I might surprise myself and start having more self-belief! Character building, so it is! :happy:
 
@Saint Nik , sure, anything can be triggering, here or irl. You're not worthless & nei...
Thank you for your insight. I realize my mistake. It's a forum, I wasn't out to save the world. My hands are up and I got it wrong. Though I do hope for a small minority of others, if they do read my post, I so hope they can take something from it, for them.
I have learned my lesson. . .the absolute brutal hard way. No more generalising, check facts, etc :)

One good thing, it kicked off a trigger I never knew I had to face. So in a way, I am glad it happened. Not at the time, because the feelings were horrific, but what I am noticing is I am definitely making progress!

Thank you for your wise words though. They have helped and I take note of the valid points you have made too ;)
 
I genuinely do care about other people's feelings. I really do. I know how painful it is to hurt and be mistreated, unloved, not valued, etc. . . and I would hate it in myself if I ever made another fellow human being feel that way!
I have no idea what topic set all this off and totally missed it (I think). I just wanted to mention there are some subtleties to all this. It IS possible, obviously, for someone to set out to try to hurt someone. Once that meanness is thrown out there, the recipient has to chose whether or not they are hurt by it and how much hurt they feel. Just because you INTEND to hurt someone doesn't mean you will. The reverse is also true. Being hurtful might be the farthest thing from your mind and yet the recipient may feel hurt. My T likes to say "Communication is what the hearer hears." Which means, if you're the speaker, and you care, you should do your best to be clear. You are still not able to force the hearer to hear what you want them to.

I was kind of raised to believe that I WAS responsible for other people's feelings, and that it was my job to make sure other people felt what they wanted to feel. But, the reality is/was, I still couldn't MAKE them feel it. And I usually didn't know what they wanted and the last rule of the game was that I'd never get it right..... So I can kind of understand how the situation you're talking about would be hard. You might look at it as a chance to learn too. From what I've seen of you around here, I have a hard time imagining you actually being hurtful. Annoying, maybe, to people who saw/see things differently, but that's kind of part of life. (I hope you can get some sleep!)
 
Yes but in a good way:

Makes me face unpleasant memories and I hope that will help me move past them.
 
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