Hello, I'm Suzie Q

[suzie q]

I have recently been experiencing some symptoms that lead me to believe that I might have to do more trauma work concerning my past sexual abuse issues. I have worked hard over the years on them, but apparently something else needs to be processed.

I remember the posts on another forum talking about starting this format, and I'm so glad it's here.

My sexual abuse (as I can remember) goes back to when I was around 8. Will give details on another thread. At 16, I was kidnapped and raped repeatedly for months and attempted suicide. At 22, I was violently raped, went to court, and they let him go.

I feel as if I totally hate sexual contact, even sexual suggestions. I panic and freeze. I feel threatened and in danger and will go to any length to stop the sexual process. This has been going on my whole life.

I have been diagnosed with so many different things and given so many different medications over the years. I do feel that the mix of medications I take now keeps me balanced most of the time. I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist in early 90's with PTSD, and that's as far as it went. Lately I have been educating myself about PTSD and have started working on my symptoms and trauma.

This is the general description of me. Thanks to all that made this forum possible. I hope I can help myself here, as well as maybe help others. :help:

 

[fairydust]

Hi! Welcome. I'm new to this forum as well but so far I ave found everyone very open and willling to assist and share as much as possible.

Fairydust:wave::wave:

 

[WonderingWhy]

Welcome Suzie Q,

I am so sorry:( that you went through what you did. You are definitely one strong person.:hug:
How terrible to go through the court process just to have it fail you!:furious::banghead: That makes me so mad to hear.
Was the 1st case convicted?:confused: I certainly hope so.:thinking:

You mentioned that you have been diagnosed with "so many things" if you look through some of "Anthony's" posts he mentions that many times doctors include diagnosis that are superlative as they are actually included within the PTSD diagnosis. Of course you did not mention your other diagnosis so I am not sure if this might be it, in your case. Just something I thought I would mention.

I am glad that you found your way here. I am so sorry that you have had so many horrible things happen to you.

 

[cherryblossom]

Hello Suzie Q - welcome to the forum :wave:

Glad you managed to find us :D

You are very welcome here. I'm sure like most of us, you have more than one issue. Feel free to post what you want/need to in the appropriate forum. I don't think I've seen any posts here go unanswered! :thumbsup:No-one here will judge you, and you are very safe to post here :)

 

[Lucycat]

Hi Suzie and welcome to SSA!!:hug::hug::hug:

 

[suzie q]

Thanks fairydust, wonderingwhy, and brucielucy for the warm welcome:D! I too hope that you all find what you need to heal. I will be around the forum and hope to see you there:wave: suzie q

 

[WonderingWhy]

Suzie Q,

I just wanted to say that your avatar is Great!:D I can't help but smile :dance:when I look at it. And that is a very good thing!:bounce:

 

[suzie q]

Thanks wonderingwhy!

I often find myself looking into the mirror to make sure my real face doesn't look like that..and guess what? It often does!!! My avatar helps me smile when I'm trying to post difficult issues. Wanted to say that I follow the Serenity Prayer every day.:nerd::praying::thumbsup: suzie q