Poll How Are Your Friendships?

[Changing4Best]

I know what you are talking about Sheila.... It does make friendships here harder because I am not a southern, I am in a interracial marriage and I think so much differently.

I am or have been all these things, though I am a widow now. However, I never was anything but a widow since the day I moved here (and before). My hubby was from Argentina and spoke 5 languages quite fluently. He was well tanned all the time, working outside or just the leftovers from such. He was 5'2" and I was 5'7" and folks never could quite get used to that! He'd tell someone to come and meet his wife and they would expect a short little Spanish speaking women or I'd say to come meet my hubby and they'd expect him to be a tall American guy! It was FUN to play around with folks reactions though, hee hee...

These days, I don't get much flack for having married him, as no one knows about our height difference. I also mention that he was a great cook and that pretty well makes them interested and not predujiced, thank God.

None the less, the northern/southern thing seems insurmountable! It almost makes me want to go back to the New York State mountains with my tail between my legs, (if you know about dogs, that will make sense). How do you deal with it?!?

 

[Changing4Best]

I seem to make friends pretty easily among certain types of people.

I'm happy for you! Enjoy.

 

[Changing4Best]

I started an online friendship with 2 other ladies this morning who are trying to lose weight. I figured there is strength in numbers. We all belong to an online group called Overeaters and we each separately agreed that to work together. I have great hopes that we 3 combining forces can help one another even more than 2 by 2 and enjoy these friendships more too!

 

[safenow]

I am surround by folks who hate me for being a Yankee, yet I do NOT hate them!!!

My step-mother hated black people. I mean hated them almost as much as she hated children. My half sister had dark complexion and dark brown eyes. She was called a "niger" a lot. She instilled in me a fear of black people. The first time I saw a negro I screamed and tried to crawl into the shelf and hid behind the cans at the grocery store. My foster mother thought he had done something to me, so the store manager had him arrested. The fact is, he had done nothing.

Over the years I had a lot of black friends. One of them, Vanessa and I drove south to see the country. When we got into south Carolina, a cop pulled us over, and told her to get in the back seat. "Nigers don't sit with white folks around here." I was shocked. I mean, this was not the 1940s like it was back when my step-mother called my sister that. We almost got arrested because I began to argue with that cop. Needless to say, we got out of that state and back up north as fast as we could.

I don't know how you can bear the way peple talk to "northerners" down there.

 

[safenow]

Speaking of friends, I only have a couple of friends. The others are all acquaintances. The only reason I don't have a lot of friends is because of my PTSD and being a multi. That, plus the fact that I've had to move so many times. I love my friends to pieces.

I know that I am an intense person and that drives most people to distraction. And when I'm happy, I tend to bubble over. But for some reason I attract evil people into my life. For some reason they hate me, and I end up in some nasty situations because of it. I try to use caution, because I don't want any more of my friends getting hurt because of me.

 

[Changing4Best]

I don't know how you can bear the way peple talk to "northerners" down there.

I have a very hard time with it, but I just cannot afford to move elsewhere right now. It took me 12 years to get out of Florida, but I had NO CLUE what I was getting into when I moved here! For awhile I was just puzzled. Then as it started to sink in, I got mad! But that does no good either, then they will hate you more, if they sense it. I've tried to hide it... but these days I try to forgive, because afterall, it is learned bahavior that all the other southerners do here too, so none of them realizes that it just might be WRONG. Certainly according to the Bible it is! I read the book of Philemon today and it clearly states some very interesting things on the subject of hatred and prejudice and slavery.

This town has 2600 folks in it, and something like 14 churches! So I assume that the majority of the folks here have at least SOME knowledge of the Bible!!! However, realizing that it applies to oneself and applying it to one's life? THAT is a whole 'nuther' ballgame.

 

[safenow]

I read the book of Philemon today

I too like Paul. He came from a very bad acting man to a righteous man and taught Timothy a lot, didn't he? Just yesterday I was reading an article called, "Being a More Christian Christian," By Elder Robert D. Hales. It was really good in reminding us what it means. We not only need to believe in Christ, we need to do what He ask us to do by being good Christian neighbors, practicing the pure religion of visiting and serving the widows, the fatherless, the poor, and all who are in need.

Like a wise woman once said, Just because you go to church doesn't make you a good Christian any more than being in a garage makes you a car.

Off my soap box now.

 

[Changing4Best]

Just yesterday I was reading an article called, "Being a More Christian Christian," By Elder Robert D. Hales. It was really good in reminding us what it means.

I think we all could always be better Christians. It is too easy in this fallen world to fall into sin. I've been a glutten this winter. I gained a bunch of weight to pay for it! LOL... And now I am on a diet, which also is paying for it!! So there are always consequences, as well as the guilty feelings.

I try to read my Bible every morning, I know that spending time with The Word, is the same as spending time with Jesus, for He is The Word. And Jesus is the best FRIEND that one can have!

 

[MagiLisu]

I don't have many close friendships. I have lost a lot of friends over the years. I find it very difficult to trust people, and I also get overwhelmed by people quite easily. I need to take things at my own pace.

I find people quite scary if I am honest, yet I feel so lonely at times as well.

 

[Anna]

I have one or two very close friends.

I find it hard because of my distrust to keep friendships. I tend to push people away. I am very very careful, I would rather have a few good friends than many shallow friends. I see people as being generally bad, it takes a long time for me to get to know people and trust them. Quite often I have been betrayed and let down or disgusted by their egocentric selfish human behaviour. Especially materialism, or stupid comments about money etc.....

I prefer a few deep thinking kind individuals to the many selfish egocentric materialistic gits out there. My view is the majority are nasty, and it is only a few small people that are actually nice. That is just my view though.

 

[safenow]

it is only a few small people that are actually nice.

I tend to agree with you. It is not just your view. I'm sorry to say, I see it all over the world now. A very sad state of affairs, if you ask me.

 

[MagiLisu]

Especially materialism, or stupid comments about money etc.....

I agree with this, I find that because I'm not a materialistic person that I often have little to talk about with most people. I don't have endless streams of money, and even if I did I wouldn't want to spend every weekend buying things I don't need.