How do I stop a bad memory from popping

[Anthony benjamin]

How do I stop a bad memory from popping up when I do or think about a particular thing? I made a mistake recently and this memory keeps popping up in my head most times I do or think about a particular thing, I feel hopeless, any drugs for this?

 

[Friday]

1. Are you talking about a normal memory, an emotionally charged memory, a memory that directly challenges your sense of self, a memory tied to trauma (although not trauma itself), a trigger or stressor (a closer tie to trauma), a memory of life threatening trauma or sexual assault, etc.?

(What kind of memory matters, as there are different tips/tricks/tools/techniques for dealing with things that are symptom based, or tied into core beliefs, or, or, or.)

2. How big of a mistake did you make? IE is how you’re thinking/feeling commensurate, or wildly over/under reacting?

(Were people hurt/killed by your mistake? Has your mistake cost yourself -or others- core elements in their lives, like their jobs/relationships/homes/freedom? Et Cetera on the big mistake side of things. Red sock in the whites, drank the last beer, didn’t pay a bill on time, etc., on the lower end of things.)

3. (As this is your first post) Do you have PTSD? Or been diagnosed with any other disorders?

^^^ Which is both useful on the skillz side of things, but vital on the potential use of medication. As there are a great many medications that assist certain disorders, that are ruinous with other disorders. For example? The stimulants that smooth out & soothe/clarify people with PTSD+ADHD’s thoughts/feelings/anxiety/dysreg CAUSE not just dysreg & anxiety, but full blown paranoia, mixed episodes (manic + suicidal), & psychosis in bipolar, GAD, & neurotypical folk. Meanwhile someone with PTSD+OCD is going to be dealing with the double whammy of magical thinking & reality, etc., etc., etc..

 

[Movingforward10]

It's difficult because avoiding things only works for so long.

You could try two things:
Working through the memory so that you process the emotions around it and it becomes less overwhelming.
And/or try 'thought stopping' where you tell yourself "this memory isn't for now. I'll come to it at X time , right now I need to do Y."

 

[Anthony benjamin]

1. Are you talking about a normal memory, an emotionally charged memory, a memory that directly challenges your sense of self, a memory tied to trauma (although not trauma itself), a trigger or stressor (a closer tie to trauma), a memory of life threatening trauma or sexual assault, etc.?

(What kind of memory matters, as there are different tips/tricks/tools/techniques for dealing with things that are symptom based, or tied into core beliefs, or, or, or.)

2. How big of a mistake did you make? IE is how you’re thinking/feeling commensurate, or wildly over/under reacting?

(Were people hurt/killed by your mistake? Has your mistake cost yourself -or others- core elements in their lives, like their jobs/relationships/homes/freedom? Et Cetera on the big mistake side of things. Red sock in the whites, drank the last beer, didn’t pay a bill on time, etc., on the lower end of things.)

3. (As this is your first post) Do you have PTSD? Or been diagnosed with any other disorders?

^^^ Which is both useful on the skillz side of things, but vital on the potential use of medication. As there are a great many medications that assist certain disorders, that are ruinous with other disorders. For example? The stimulants that smooth out & soothe/clarify people with PTSD+ADHD’s thoughts/feelings/anxiety/dysreg CAUSE not just dysreg & anxiety, but full blown paranoia, mixed episodes (manic + suicidal), & psychosis in bipolar, GAD, & neurotypical folk. Meanwhile someone with PTSD+OCD is going to be dealing with the double whammy of magical thinking & reality, etc., etc., etc..

Are you there? I want to tell you that I'm busy and I may not be able to write back at you for a some time. Please remember this thread. I'm seriously bothered by this

 

[arfie]

hello anthony. welcome to the forum.

i haven't found an effective way to block memories. what works for me is to process and heal the trauma far enough that it is no more intrusive than a pleasant memory popping up in similar fashion. human memory banks are not quite as predictable as the digital ones on your computer.

 

[Anthony benjamin]

1. Are you talking about a normal memory, an emotionally charged memory, a memory that directly challenges your sense of self, a memory tied to trauma (although not trauma itself), a trigger or stressor (a closer tie to trauma), a memory of life threatening trauma or sexual assault, etc.?

(What kind of memory matters, as there are different tips/tricks/tools/techniques for dealing with things that are symptom based, or tied into core beliefs, or, or, or.)

2. How big of a mistake did you make? IE is how you’re thinking/feeling commensurate, or wildly over/under reacting?

(Were people hurt/killed by your mistake? Has your mistake cost yourself -or others- core elements in their lives, like their jobs/relationships/homes/freedom? Et Cetera on the big mistake side of things. Red sock in the whites, drank the last beer, didn’t pay a bill on time, etc., on the lower end of things.)

3. (As this is your first post) Do you have PTSD? Or been diagnosed with any other disorders?

^^^ Which is both useful on the skillz side of things, but vital on the potential use of medication. As there are a great many medications that assist certain disorders, that are ruinous with other disorders. For example? The stimulants that smooth out & soothe/clarify people with PTSD+ADHD’s thoughts/feelings/anxiety/dysreg CAUSE not just dysreg & anxiety, but full blown paranoia, mixed episodes (manic + suicidal), & psychosis in bipolar, GAD, & neurotypical folk. Meanwhile someone with PTSD+OCD is going to be dealing with the double whammy of magical thinking & reality, etc., etc., etc..

I'm back. I've been busy all day and still have stuff to do so I might not answer you for several hours. Please still remember the thread

 

[Jade-]

The more you try not to think about something the more you're going to.

It's best to find ways to deal with the memory when it does pop up rather than trying to get it to not pop up at all.

 

[Dark.Green.Feathers]

As others have said, there’s no way to stop them, but there are ways to build grounding and coping methods, which as they’re developed, help keep you in your window of tolerance until it passes. The ultimate fix is processing the trauma, but this is a much deeper and lengthy process which you will need the grounding skills in order to get there.

What I’ve been doing in therapy is developing a “toolkit” of things that can keep or help return me “to the green”. Actions, thoughts, items, sensory inputs. I find it hard to employ these at first, but the more I try it the more it slowly reaches towards being second-nature.

And it very much depends on what the nature of the memories are what works/what I need.

 

[deno]

I can relate to this. For a long time, I tried to suppress bad memories, thinking that if I just buried them deep enough, they would stop interfering with my life. But they don’t just disappear—they collect, build up, and show up in ways we don’t always expect. What has helped me is shifting from trying to stop them to allowing myself to deal with them on my terms.

For me, that means recognizing when a memory comes up and consciously deciding how to respond. Sometimes that means sitting with it, acknowledging it, and reminding myself that I am not in that moment anymore. Other times, it means grounding myself in the present with something tangible—touch, sound, movement—so I don’t get lost in the past.

It’s not about making them go away but about changing the way they impact me. And over time, they’ve lost some of their power. It’s a process, but it’s possible.

 

[Helpfulmom34]

Honestly I found Ashwaghanda extremely effective for this(along with other elements of CPTSD), but this was *a big part of what it helped for me*.

Consider looking into it(and seeing if it's a good fit for you)? There are studies on how it helps chronic/long term stress(and we are essentially battling chronic long term stress responses with CPTSD).

Just be weary of if you have GI issues/are prone to GI side effects/or have an autoimmune condition and don't go straight for whatever you think is strongest(or claims to be), do the research so you make wise choices in regards to this(many providers even have this in their drop down, for medication now) so you can discuss it with them as well.

 

[Friday]

Are you there? I want to tell you that I'm busy and I may not be able to write back at you for a some time. Please remember this thread. I'm seriously bothered by this

I'm back. I've been busy all day and still have stuff to do so I might not answer you for several hours. Please still remember the thread

I don’t need to be online for you to answer the Q’s.

We’re a message board, not live chat.

If you’re looking for real-time connection / live chat? I’d highly recommend 7 Cups of Tea >>> https://www.7cups.com/