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How Do We Win?

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griz: im 34 and i dont know where to start either. i chased away a great gal last october and i havnt really began any healing process. i feel like a total faggot for even saying that. i have NEVER had relationship issues that i couldnt just roll off my chest. i think its because i was handed a "perfect" situation and managed to f*ck it up. im sure we have all been there. i wish i had tried harder, or gotten help sooner, or just kept my mouth shut. im a freakn idiot.

Get back in touch with her, if you miss her so badly.

She might just see what you have to say.
 
Get back in touch with her, if you miss her so badly.

She might just see what you have to say.
we still talk occasionally. she has been watching my (our?) dog since ive been visiting family in hawaii. so we kind of keep in touch. she isnt sure if she wants to "put her herself out there again just to be further belittled and frightened." and i totally understand that. she doesnt take no shit from no one which is one of the reasons i love her but that includes from me. so that factor may prove that there was no future to begin with for a strong woman and my ptsd ass. shit i dont know. im babbling again. i apologize for hijacking this thread. ill sack up and start my own next time.
 
It sounds like she's voicing exactly what pushed her away in the first place. If you can show her that you're making steps to change your behavior, then she might be willing to give it another try.
 
Weird timing. we just had a chat and she told me she decided to move on. oh well. atleast i wont have to obsess about it anymore. back to square one.
 
Hey bro, good luck to you. My wife and I are trying to unf*ck things ourselves :( not knowing whats going on sucks :(
 
yeah its the not knowing. im not sure yet but i may actually be feeling better. ill keep yall posted. very glad to hear that you and yours are in the un-f*cking process. dual participation is pretty important. good on ya both for gutting it out. im really liking this site by the way.
 
5line that's how she feels now. Maybe you can let it rest and see what happens.
Not meaning for you to hold on and keep hope but it gives breathing space for yourself now.
Having this hungry beast inside of you AND waiting for your gf to decide is a lot.
 
Its tough bro. Not going to lie, Idk how the future is going to be, but im just trying to learn how to stand back up when the rug gets pulled out from under ya. Im very scared but what happened is done but trying to move on. This site has a mountain of info and great people. Thanks everyone
 
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