How Do You All Do Those Trauma Diaries?

[joeylittle]

I detached at first by using bullet points to encapsulate the events, and avoiding using pronouns whenever possible.

Another technique is to write in the third person - don't say 'I', say 'zoogal', use 'she/he' instead of 'me'.

You can distance further by naming characters - it's interesting how assigning articles and replacement names can help. So, if I were writing about being abused by my mother, I could say 'The duckling was afraid of the monster. The monster hit the duckling and the duckling ran away.' (calling myself duckling, just because it's my avatar).

So, some options, from immediate to very far might be:

• I remember my mother hitting me, and me hiding under the bed.
• Mother hits/hiding under bed. (bullet point, can also be past tense).
• My mother used to hit me, and I'd hide under the bed.
• Mother used to hit duckling, and she'd hide under the bed.
• The monster used to hit the duckling, and the duckling would hide under the bed.

And you don't have to be consistent, either.

The point is to move closer to these memories, so you're aiming to write as directly about your experience as possible - but it can be overwhelming to do that immediately. So, you can give yourself steps, and move closer gradually.

Additionally, you can impose time limits on how long you allow yourself to write about your trauma; go for 20 minutes, and when the time is up, just be done. Figure out how long is too long. This will add an element of detachment by introducing a present-day frame to the act of writing.

Rate your SUDS (subjective unit of distress) before and after - if you're at a 6, because you're anxious about writing, and then after 20 minutes you are at a 9, make notes on both those things. It's an additional technique that lets you observe yourself while in the process - which provides distancing as well.

 

[katz]

I didn't even do that all I did was give the gist of my life and I sat in my damn bathroom for an hour t...

I only write what I can. I only write when I need to. I have some times gone for months between writings. I usually write to help myself believe and to remember. I go back and reread some times. I also find letters and notes to myself that I don't even remember doing. They tell me how bad I am feeling and what I'm going thru at the time, then there are lots of them that I wrote to myself telling me how good I'm doing and how much I have gone thru.

Why don't you try writing to yourself and tell yourself how good you're doing. You may not feel very good, but, try and write it like it is some one else. Down the road, maybe when you're feeling even lower. You will go back and reread the letter and feel a little better about yourself. And, the advice will be from a good source so you know it will be true! And will probably be "just what you need."