My mentor told me a long time ago, "two steps backwards-three steps forward. two steps backwards-three steps forward. Look at you! You are doing the cha-cha! Just keep dancing & you'll move forward" (easy for me to say because I'm not sinking right now. but I hope you can feel some encouragement. PTSD is hard, especially during the healing moments
@Ronin@hithere Thank you both! I feel getting encouragement on days like this is really needed. I am trying to tell myself that having a regular day is okay, but it's tough. Especially when I had so many expectations about this fall that got completely swept away between mental health and starting new meds and physical health and physiotherapy for a full month for the ankle I sprained. And now...now ...well, I am where I am. I will try to start again in the morning, fresh day, try to do better than before and try to remember that change will come. It helps though, writing on here, at least a bit.
I have a lot of regrets about things I've missed that I've been remembering lately. One day soon I'll have to spend a bit more time on those and figure out whether it's time to let them go, or do something about them. But that is for another day. All I'm trying to do right now is to relax and snap out of that feeling that having a regular work day is not enough(when there have been very recent times when working full day was a challenge).
Ah yes, pointless days, so many over the last couple years. Sorry to say that on average when the dawn breaks on such a day, I choke down a handfull of meds, hide until the bed covers and chide myself for not doing the right thing in the first place.