How Do You Observe Feelings Without Judgement?

[Anna]

Hi Anna,

If you are familiar with "wise mind" concept it seems you are living in Reasonable Mind and have cut Emotional Mind right out of your experiencing.

I agree, but I think it is a defence mechanism for me. If I felt I think I would fall apart. I cannot choose this, I guess my mind has chosen for me. I do sometimes have moments where I wake up not realising where I am, what day it is.... I am guilty of dissociation to an extreme degree. It helps me to survive though, without it I would fall apart.

 

[Abstract]

Hi Anna,
I think it always a defence mechanism. I hope your therapist works on it with you though as when we cut out what we perceive as bad the good goes too.

 

[anni]

Don't wish to interrupt a flow of conversation and be annoying, just saw the thread title- thought I'd answer with what's been helpful personally? I better give the disclaimer first, since I think she gets written off a little as awfully New-Agey. She really isn't, just non-denominational. I also do not always resonate with what she says- it's a little dangerous to do that with anyone anyway since it tends to set that person up as some guru, you know?

This non-judgemental thing is something Marianne Williamson hits hard in pretty much all of her books. If I were to recommend one, would have to say ' The Gift of Change '- written after her personal growth seems to have softened up her hard-charge approach a bit in ' The Gift of Love '. ' Illuminata ' has some truly meditative prayers aimed at non-judgemental perspectives also. I know everyone struggles with this, and has their own take on how to deal with it, this one just 'works' incredibly well for me personally. I like what she has to say a LOT. She's one author you never, ever end up feeling awful about yourself after closing the book, while at the same time resolving to go DO something about whatever it is you feel requires a good dose of Better.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Thank you anni. I will order the book. I am looking for ways to focus on the good. I know what you mean I think. Thanks for sharing. I appreciate it alot.

 

[anni]

You're welcome- I got the name of her first book wrong, no surprise. It's ' A return to Love'. Like I said- it's still good, just my own PTSD doesn't always deal well with her take on some things in it. I truly, truly only thought I'd mentioned it because I also struggle with 'judgements'. Like every, single day- fight it terribly! ' Gosh look at that person, he/she is so mean/pushy/slovenly- whatever. TERRIBLE, truly! I still haven't figured out what on earth to do with really awful people who geuininely do wish me harm- not going to worry about that right now. Some of Williamson's stuff is a little hard to swallow since it means we HAVE to drop some dearly held constructions of the go. If you have a Kindle, will honestly be happy to lend it, btw. Kindle does this 'thing' where it allows you to lend books for 2 weeks, then they automatically revert to the owner's library, pretty cool. I have a few of hers on Kindle. I know there must be a way to share ebooks via computer- maybe if you have an Amazon account, not sure.

Please excuse how long with this on your thread. Intrusive, isn't it? :) I did see your accidental posting of your pic, and made me smile- you have an awfully nice face, I'm guessing do not mind being 'seen'. :) Not sure what a gizmo would be, too pretty to be whatever one sounds like, please excuse the personal note.....

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Hi anni, I do not have a kindle. But thank you of thinking of me. I will try to order her book. I have a horrible time judging. I would love to be free of it. Thank you for the kind words. Your post was not too long. I lost my tree pictures is my computer and I do not know how to get them back.

 

[anni]

Here I am Christmas morning, waiting for everyone to wake up, sitting on my hands to not go make noise on purpose. Thought I'd anchor myself to the sofa with the computer. :)

I just posted a pic here I lost 2 or 3 years ago, so don't give up hope. Don't know if you saw it over on the share your tree thread, it's the one where the tree fell over one year. Hee. I even found it all by myself, and I'm SO unbelievably foggy with these things it frustrates me daily. I'm lucky, have a hubby who does IT but didn't want to bug him looking for one teeny pic. What I do is enter dumb stuff in Google, then read what other people say on various forums, you know? " How do you find lost photos on computer ' or whatever, then browse what comes up. Now, it took me a couple of years because I don't think I was using the correct words- you might be better at the language than me.