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Wonder Woman
MyPTSD Pro
I'm here. Not sure for how much longer, but if you need to rant, I'm listening.
This is a very personal and possibly not-good-for-you way that I deal with these feelings, but I often feel like I'm in more control of my body when I spend some alone time giving it happy sexual memories, if you get my meaning. It's like an overwrite of whatever's been done to me. (With a plus side of making me sleepy afterwards) Absolutely don't take this as concrete advice because I know it only works for me because I feel very comfortable with feeling sexual. On more thought, it might make things worse because I don't know the specifics of your situation.
Can you read something fluffy? Like a good romance novel or watch a movie? I'm a medical nerd so I often fall asleep watching surgery videos but not sure that's quite your style. Can you take a bath (NOT A SHOWER, just a soak) to reset your physical state?
Hi, rumor. Thank you for responding.
Your first suggestion is too scary for me. Long story needed to explain, and way to personal for a forum post.
These rape-like sensations would get connected to any book or movie I'd use to try to distract myself.
I tried bathing, earlier, because it use to help me relax. However, I recently remembered an episode of abuse from my early childhood, and since that memory surfaced baths are problematic for me.
I think that is the reason I am struggling so much. I am being inundated with new memories. Plus, the stuff that used to comfort me is no longer working, or even worse adding to my distress.
I'm so tired that I'm beyond exhausted. I went to bed, expecting sleep. Sadly, it hasn't happened, and the way I'm feeling (in my body) it just isn't possible.