How To Decide When To Take Occasional Medication (diazepam)

[Hashi]

Thank you so much for all the responses. I wasn't thinking I'd get any.

Once I got down to 1 tab, I told myself I was saving it for the Armageddon. Lol.

SoL, you made me laugh. Which is an achievement right now! Must be good stuff, if it'll get you through Armageddon.

Would some basic NHS talk therapy makes things worse or could it be of some help?

It might help, but I've been on a waiting list for 3 and a half years now. There aren't any services in my area unless you make a suicide attempt. The waiting list is if/when they ever offer other services again. :( They just point people to charities instead, which all have their own waiting lists, and limitations.

Yes, diazepam is benodiazepine. I just looked it up and Ativan is one too, so it's good to know that other people understand. They do work for me and other things don't.

I agree that some sort of happy medium is needed between doctors dishing them out and keeping them locked up as if in a bank vault. The problem is that they were prescribed all over the place in the UK in the past, and there were huge problems with addiction. Now they dish out antidepressants instead, but that's a different story. Basically, most NHS doctors would be as wary with diazepam as mine is.

I practise a lot of other coping skills and do my own processing, but I'm exhausted and things feel overwhelming at the moment. I just need an occasional break from that in order to keep going. I can sleep, thankfully.

Reading through responses, what resonates most with me is the idea of getting a little more diazepam. I'd still be far from the possibility of dependency, because it wouldn't be enough to take one a week, but at least if I can have a few more to fall back on when I really need to that would make things better.

I see my therapist for the last time today before taking a break, so I'll ask if she's willing to talk to my GP on my behalf.

Thanks for your thoughts and support.

 

[Don't trip]

Hashi,

Here's hoping that you can get the script you need to be able to be functional and comfortable. I trust that you know what's best for you. Too many are tossed antidepressants or over medicated with psyche medications, but for some people, benzos truly work for a variety of reasons. To prevent someone from getting a medication that continues to get a bad wrap and assumes the person who desires to take this medication as a potential addict, is repulsive and insulting to me. Particularly those with PTSD. I'm vigilant about my medications. I take them as prescribed and have NO issues. I am very aware of how it affects me and because I have high sensitivities to side effects of medications, I can take relatively few that work for me, so I covet being able to have the medications that I do that do work. I'm also very fortunate to have a good trusting relationship with my doctor and my therapist.

My doctor ONCE tried to switch me from my lorazepam to Cymbalta. HELL. NO. She wanted to switch me up when I had a clean record with her and had always taken my medications as prescribed. I found out, it wasn't she but the CLINIC administrator who was paranoid about her LICENSE..."we only give benzos in combination with opiates for three months". Ohhh, okay, but you're willing to try me on a DANGEROUS anti depressant, that you KNOW I have serious side effects with, but will keep me on the opiates for pain relief? It's insanity out there, Hashi, and there really is no logic to it at all.

So, my therapist told me they would handle the lorazepam side of it, if doctor tried to pull that one on me again.

You seem so aware. Awareness is key in being able to take these prescriptions properly. The 'addiction' piece, in my opinion, is merely bullshit and nothing more than covering ass in the medical community. Sure, there are those who become 'addicted' as in psychologically, but statistically, this does NOT prove to be true for most. There is a marked difference between dependence and addiction. Keep advocating for yourself until you get what you need.

I take, overall, one lorazepam a day. Even with extreme anxiety attacks, I have passed up taking one in the past. I don't do that anymore.

A little interesting 'footnote' here: I saw a cardiologist recently for palpatations. I have to wear a heart monitor and have a nuclear stress test done next month. I talked to the cardiologist about the opiate medication. I wanted to know what effects, if any, is this med having on my heart.

He told me that it's a great medication when taken properly as it keeps the BLOOD PRESSURE DOWN when pain levels are high, hence keeping the heart functioning properly as well as the immune system. Pain, whether it is physical or psychological has a negative domino affect on the human body. Stress via PTSD and anxiety, especially so. If the med helps you to remain calm and to return your heart rate and blood pressure to normal and has a calming affect on you, it's HEALTHY for you to take.

We focus so much on the negative with these medications that for some are life saving. A friend of mine recently had her benzos taken from her for PTSD. She was not an addict, had taken them for years with great success. It was the physician who cut her off and this happens often. What do you think was the alternative? Alcohol.

If the patient/client needs the medication, and it works for them and they are using it responsibly, LET. THEM.

Good luck to you in this. Sending positive thoughts your way for a peaceful outcome!

 

[Hashi]

Don't trip, thank you. You really get where I am with this, and I value your support and encouragement very much.

My therapist was completely behind the idea, I can ask my doctor to ring her if the doctor doesn't like it. We'll see what happens, but I'm hopng.

Thank you everyone for replying, it means a lot to me.

 

[Don't trip]

Hashi!

That's GREAT news! Sending angel love towards you, hoping and praying for the best for you!

 

[Powder]

I agree with the post above that worry about addiction is less a priority than getting out of suicidal ideation phases, long-term damage to your heart and immune system, and other issues with NOT taking something to calm your body.

I am against using pills for many reasons. However, I think that if I had been given this drug years ago, I might never have developed the severe health problems I now have (heart and esophagus) which are caused by holding onto long term stress with no relief.

Now, I realize I will likely bear the fruit of PTSD in these ways as a pattern, but I can manage and maybe prevent further damage to my body by taking regular medication to manage stress. I do think, though, that I need to also keep up my walking, water drinking, sleep hygiene and other stress reduction steps I know help me. I also want to be back in therapy and am thinking about driving 3 hours to go to someone who focuses on my diagnosis.

That said, I honor your choices and know that you have a good head on your shoulders. This stuff is all addictive, but so is air, food, water, sleep, sex and exercise and we don't complain about those.

Take care, my friend, and see your value, Muse

 

[Abstract]

Hashi,
I have a theory about talk therapy with the NHS. It obviously varies from dr to dr of course.

It is that if one asks for help with PTSD, trauma, eating disorders etc one could easily die whilst waiting. And yet if you go in saying you are a little stressed and need someone to talk to then a few weeks later it all comes through. I have tested it a few times now and seen it with others. The help provided certainly isn't ideal but has been a literal life saver for me in the past.

Somehing similar applies to diazapham. Again it varies huegely with different dr's of course. My husband has been doled out unrestricted supplies (which he does not use a lot) and for an undiagnosed mild anxiety disorder/social anxiety.

I would: ask to see a different dr if necessary; ask for what you want. You have probably done both of course but I thought it worth mentioning!

 

[Abstract]

Just saw your last post. That sounds really hopeful! :) Good luck!

 

[Powder]

Hashi, benzos have long proved to be the only med that shows immediate relief for anxiety in PTSD. Clonidine is also used for when the heart is pounding, even on benzos.

Dr.'s are divided because while they know it works, they know the dependency it causes. They don't take that lightly. Only you can decide. Benzos have allowed me to work through my trauma and still hold down two jobs. I am grateful for that "progress."

But I also dislike "needing" it; but I accept I have the PTSD, so I accept that this is my best treatment available for now.

I hope you find what works for you best. Experiment.

 

[Powder]

PS. if you want you can ask for Clonidine (Catapress, a blood pressure/sedation-like med) in place of Ativan (benzos). It is mostly for sleep, but it calms you all day. You take it just before sleep. I have naturally low blood pressure (usually!) so Clonidine made me feel too "low" and tired after a while. I quit taking it for that reason.

But I have read medical journals that recommend trying it first, in place of benzos, to see if it works, because you can wean off of it without anxiety coming back. Benzos wean off can bring on panic as withdrawl symptoms worse than what the baseline anxiety was.

 

[quaintpapercut]

Don't Trip, thanks for your post. It really made me think/change my perspective about using benzo's. Especially the bit about it lowering your heart rate and it being beneficial for your overall health.

Hashi, it's great that your therapist is willing to advocate for you if necessary :tup: . Hope it works out and you can get what you need.

 

[Only 1 of me]

Hi hashi, just wondered how you are getting on. Hope you had success with your doctor. Best wishes and hugs if you accept them x

 

[Only 1 of me]

Glad to see you on here, and to be reading your eloquent posts :-)