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How To Simulate Being A Sailor.

  • Post starter Post starter Wagon
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He he, You stole mine Barberian. I was just thinking, "someone has to write something about the heads". Nice.

Yeah, we had a few popular films when I was in. (86-90 active, 90-94 reserves, 92-97 merchant marines) Although I can't say I saw much. Sleep was a priority. The very twisted porn "Barn Yard Follies" made divisional rounds a few times on the battleship. Normally a few days ahead of the Master at Arms.

I was on USS Fulton AS11, USS Iowa BB61 and COOP Mine Unit CT15. Quartermaster.

Wagon
 
FFS, Ron Jeremy and 'Barn Yard Follies'.
Site Guard on various installations (all nuke) in West Germany in the eighties. On QRF we just sat around watching that shit on a loop.
Was almost a relief to get a crash-out.........
 
lol ya that was the one I remember too... (cut to Ron Jeremy doing what he did best) he looks around and says "look at all those cows.... you ever wonder what they are thinking?" lol... man the memories...

of course you would have to remove the door to the bathroom and put a see through plastic curtain, or like on the Austin, nothing at all... Take down the shower curtain as well. Move everyone's bed to the main room along with their dresser and make them get dressed in the morning in front of each other... the list goes on...

Every night you make the kids stop doing their homework and sit at the kitchen table and smoke cigarettes and play spades.. (or hearts, either one) till 2200... for 6 months straight...

For me I would have to add in a few immature 18 to 20 yr olds lying around the deck in the main room wearing cammies, and looking sullen at you while you tried to make it to your rack and had to step over them... I am sure the neighbors would love to loan you their kids for that...

--edit--

I was on the USS Austin LPD-4 and USS Guam LPH-9 ... and somewhere in all my memorabilia is a Circle William DC marker for a hatch, I need to get that and superglue it to the door of my apartment lol...
 
I just remembered when I was about 14 my room was always messy at home... my dad (he was an HT) always threatened to rip up the carpet, put in a stainless steel drain and paint the walls haze gray... every week he would come in and hose down my room he said lol...
 
LST 1194, LSD-39, and a shooter that I prefer not to discuss anymore.

Damn, I forgot about O-country heads! ROFL.

Another addition:

You can tell what shape the "fish" dinner is by smell and force your family to be able to do the same:
Triangle fish, Parallelogram Fish, or Square fish.

Any time there is a thunderstorm, only serve lukewarm, processed breaded chicken patties.

Only allow family members to shower at times they are not home to shower.

Disconnect all your drains and reroute them out the side of your house. Only allow flushing if your neighbors are a minimum distance away.

Feed your kids steak and lobster before having them clean the garage, pump the septic tank, or dig a trench.

Explain "Dog Zebra" to your son....and then explain why women frown on this.
 
You mean the crew that haven`t had a shower or washed properly in a few weeks, and the stench of the farts from all the crew after you have fired a few roads, batterned down?

Can`t beat the smell of cordite when someone farts LMAO,

ahh the joys of a M109 on a fire mission
You mean the crew that haven`t had a shower or washed properly in a few weeks, and the stench of the farts from all the crew after you have fired a few roads, batterned down?

Can`t beat the smell of cordite when someone farts LMAO,

ahh the joys of a M109 on a fire mission


Surf and turf dinner, 0300 GQ locked up in a CIWS control room with your shipmates and no air circulation, farting like you're are made of dead elephants listening to the coughing and gagging until you start hearing them fall out one by one.
 
Hey Gunboy,

Good to see another squid here. Could you write a short intro in the Introductions section. Thanks

Wagon
 
Uss
lol ya that was the one I remember too... (cut to Ron Jeremy doing what he did best) he looks around and says "look at all those cows.... you ever wonder what they are thinking?" lol... man the memories...

of course you would have to remove the door to the bathroom and put a see through plastic curtain, or like on the Austin, nothing at all... Take down the shower curtain as well. Move everyone's bed to the main room along with their dresser and make them get dressed in the morning in front of each other... the list goes on...

Every night you make the kids stop doing their homework and sit at the kitchen table and smoke cigarettes and play spades.. (or hearts, either one) till 2200... for 6 months straight...

For me I would have to add in a few immature 18 to 20 yr olds lying around the deck in the main room wearing cammies, and looking sullen at you while you tried to make it to your rack and had to step over them... I am sure the neighbors would love to loan you their kids for that...

--edit--

I was on the USS Austin LPD-4 and USS Guam LPH-9 ... and somewhere in all my memorabilia is a Circle William DC marker for a hatch, I need to get that and superglue it to the door of my apartment lol...

USS GUAM LPH-9 (now a toxic man made reef off of Hampton Roads). I guess she was too sassy for razor blades?!!

After steering watch mopping up hydraulic fluid balls to six. Had a shipmate walk into the doorway after un dogging it, stared at me, asked me for a smoke, I reached in to my pocket to grab the pack and a second later he was gone, like POOF! Ran down past the chiefs quarters to the first steps up and nobody. That green hotel was haunted, I guarantee it!


lol ya that was the one I remember too... (cut to Ron Jeremy doing what he did best) he looks around and says "look at all those cows.... you ever wonder what they are thinking?" lol... man the memories...

of course you would have to remove the door to the bathroom and put a see through plastic curtain, or like on the Austin, nothing at all... Take down the shower curtain as well. Move everyone's bed to the main room along with their dresser and make them get dressed in the morning in front of each other... the list goes on...

Every night you make the kids stop doing their homework and sit at the kitchen table and smoke cigarettes and play spades.. (or hearts, either one) till 2200... for 6 months straight...

For me I would have to add in a few immature 18 to 20 yr olds lying around the deck in the main room wearing cammies, and looking sullen at you while you tried to make it to your rack and had to step over them... I am sure the neighbors would love to loan you their kids for that...

--edit--

I was on the USS Austin LPD-4 and USS Guam LPH-9 ... and somewhere in all my memorabilia is a Circle William DC marker for a hatch, I need to get that and superglue it to the door of my apartment lol...
 
Hey, Gunboy. Welcome to the forum. Could you go to the intro forum and gives us a little info on your service and whether you've been diagnosed with PTSD? That way, it'll help us help you.

Sarg
 
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