How To Tell Your Therapist?

[Elphaba]

Thank you for your advice, all. I will
- keep a journal and
- revisit it before next session and
- REALLY try to keep it at the forefront of my mind.

I wish I had a T I had a better line of communication with, but I realise I also have some responsibility and "toughening up" to do. (Also I know that T will be leaving the job in the new year, so in the back of my mind I have am doubting how much I'll get out of these sessions). It'not that I try to hide things, but I sincerely forget. I can say that "last week was rough" but i cannot give an example of an incident. It's weird... I don't think I would like having me as a patient, putting it that way!

I think processing the sessions can be really hard. So much that I am crossing my fingers hoping that I'll actually turn up next time. (And no. I haven't told T this either!)

 

[Elphaba]

Hei E!
The journal thing is a good idea! I always keep one with me just to write down whatever comes up at any time! Tried to use the recording thingy on my mobile for a while, but I could not stand my own voice in that period, so I use the notebook.

Been dealing with the same public health care as you for many years and I know the frustration about not being able to get in touch whit your T when you need to, between sessions! I recently switched, or I'm doing both private and public, but I have to say, the private T, I have never had a T who actually and honestly care about me as he does, and he is actually prepared for each session with me, able to just pick up the track from last session and ask the right questions. Hurts in my wallet, but it's worth it! It wasn't my intention to start ranting about the public healtcare system where I am, but I know how it feels for you. When I first came to this forum, and peolpe were talking about getting in contact with their T between sessions and actually get a response!? Wow.

Take care

Tch75

Thanks, Tch! No worry about slamming our public health care system here. But I do wonder if you have any advice to someone who is newer to this? I find I get NO information. Not as my rights as a patient, or as my options... maybe there are no rights and no options. (Or I might be in a negative mood today...)

 

[Elphaba]

Now I did go to my session. And I did say it - kind of. I said that I forget stuff, that when I have these "attacks", I afterwards erase it from my mind so when I come into therapy all I can give is a vague idea of how the previous week "felt". Nothing concrete. Never anything concrete. Then I remembered the one scene where I kept "phasing out" in the middle of office. I mentioned it as a typical example of things I forget.

The session went over with fifteen minutes, nearly. On my way home I was pondering whether that is a good thing or not. I suppose it could be a sign that I am more messed up than I thought, and that thought made me wonder whether I am still trying to take things too lightly. I am scared if that is the case. I feel this is heavy enough.

 

[kers]

How did your therapist respond to your description of forgetting? Did you feel heard, like she undersands better what is going on for you?

Sometimes sessions go over because the therapist has a bit of extra time and feels like you are working on something important enough to stretch the session. Again, something to address with your therapist, but I can't imagine anyone stretching a session longer for anything but a valuable discussion. It doesn't mean you are messed up or messing up.

Take it easy on yourself. What you are discussing is what you need to discuss. When you need to discuss somethign different, you will.

 

[Elphaba]

T also seemed to become more attentive suddenly, when I said this about forgetting. Then I described one of the things I had forgotten all about the previous week, and T responded that it sounded like panic attacks, and that it
is seems I am feeling very bad very often. I didn't feel I could comment. I said I have noone else to compare notes with, not really. I guess everyone is carrying their own loads, after all. Etc.

You are right - I shouldn't make assumptions about the session lasting longer. I suppose, if anything, it is a sign that the T is not just waiting and waiting for me to get out the door!

I am not really taking "charge" of therapy at all, but hope I will be better at speaking up soon!