Husband Has Ptsd... I Need Help

[hapahayn]

My husband has ptsd and is constantly going through blackouts and he gets violent if he is touched or even if I get near him. I have had him nearly choke me to death. I'm not sure what to do to stop him and I fear for our children. Has anyone had something similar happen to them? And if so how did you deal with it?

 

[Justmehere]

Please call your local women's shelter for support. You and your children are at grave risk for developing PTSD yourself, if you survive his escalating behaviors. The only way you can stop him is by leaving and taking you and your children some place safe.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I agree with @Justmehere. His symptoms are so severe that at this point you must put your safety and the safety of your kids first, above your support of him. If he is blacking out and getting violent, he needs immediate intervention, I'd say even possibly hospitalization. I wish you the best.

 

[Sweetpea76]

@hapahayn, is he getting treatment?

 

[Seagreen]

What kind of treatment is husband receiving for his PTSD? I think he needs to change tactics, even if that means hospitalisation until he is no longer a risk to others. The only way you can deal with the situation is to remove yourself and the children. I wish I could give you an alternative but there is no other way. You and your children's safety is the most urgent and important thing at the moment. Please don't make the mistake of thinking you can continue to manage it. Things could get out of hand again quickly, especially if he is not receiving treatment. You don't have to live like this. There are many other's who have been in your situation and had to make difficult decisions for the greater good of their family. You are not alone.

 

[NicoleBB]

The safety of you and your children is of utmost importance, but the state of your husband as you describe it- he needs to seek help. Is your husband a war veteran? If so, contact the VA immediately. If he is already using them, look into more resources (I personally know the VA can be -uh- but don't take no for answer- keep asking). If the source of his PTSD is non-military related please look to your local resources for help. As his spouse (not saying this is the most enjoyable thing to do) but you may have to authority to have him "picked -up" and taken to a medical facility in order to receive help. If this route has to happen it would not be pretty so you may want to have a friend or relative watch the kids.

 

[Friday]

When I was that bad, I kept myself away from people I liked/ loved/ cared about... For several years.

I didn't have a family, then, and also didn't know about treatment. I was fine. (Nope!) This was just how I was, and I needed to learn to live this way. So I thought at the time. It took me about 5 years of living in chaos before I taught myself the things people are taught in months. Your husband really has 2 choices... Get into treatment, or be a risk to everyone around him for the foreseeable future (I got lucky with 5 years, some go decades). You can lead a horse to water, but if your husband is choosing not to get treatment, he's choosing to put you & your children at risk.

We make the decision as parents to walk out in front of oncoming traffic for our kids. This is your oncoming traffic. First protect your kids & yourself.

 

[kspa]

You need to leave him and take you kids. IMMEDIATELY. The longer you wait in denial, continuing to make excuses "hoping" and "waiting" for "things to get better", they will get worse and it will destroy your children. It has probably already scared them for like. Save them and yourself from further violence. Once you are moved out with the kids, you can tell your husband that if he doesn't get help, he will never see any of you ever again. Get a restraining order too, NOW. There should be police record of these violent events. He clearly has come extremely close to killing you. Stop lying to yourself. There is very little to be confused about in terms of "what should I do" --- You should get the hell outta there.