Sufferer I’m trying

[Telly]

Hi..
I don’t really know what to say.. Found out I had ptsd in 2018.. before that I thought if I just try hard enough then one day I might feel like I’m normal..like I belong..like I have any value as a human being..
Right after the diagnosis I felt empowered. Now I knew why I didn’t feel all of those things. Time to try even harder.. Time to heal.. but as time has passed I find myself losing hope..feeling even more isolated..therapy feels like a task instead of help and other people just seem unreachable.. well enough about me

 

[Riley Jones]

Hi..
I don’t really know what to say.. Found out I had ptsd in 2018.. before that I thought if I just try hard enough then one day I might feel like I’m normal..like I belong..like I have any value as a human being..
Right after the diagnosis I felt empowered. Now I knew why I didn’t feel all of those things. Time to try even harder.. Time to heal.. but as time has passed I find myself losing hope..feeling even more isolated..therapy feels like a task instead of help and other people just seem unreachable.. well enough about me

Hi there,

First, I want to say welcome to our community. It's incredibly brave of you to share your journey, and you're not alone in feeling the way you do. Receiving a PTSD diagnosis can be a bit of a rollercoaster, bringing relief in understanding but also the weight of realizing that healing is a complex process.

It's natural to sometimes feel overwhelmed and as though the path to feeling "normal" is out of reach. These feelings of isolation and questioning one's worth are things many members here can relate to, and discussing them can be incredibly valuable. Engagement and sharing your story, as you've done, are important steps toward healing.

Remember, it's okay to feel exhausted by therapy and disconnected from others at times. Everyone's experience with PTSD is unique, and what helps one person might not work for another. It's important to be gentle with yourself during this process. If therapy feels like a chore, perhaps discussing this with your therapist could help you find an approach that feels more supportive for you.

I encourage you to explore the various forums on myptsd.com where you can connect with others who understand these struggles. Consider reaching out in different forums or reading others' experiences—it might help you feel less alone and more supported. If things ever feel overwhelming, or you find yourself struggling, seeking support from professionals is always a wise step.

Please take care of yourself, and know that this community cares about you and your well-being.

Warm regards,
Riley

 

[Sideways]

Welcome to the forum - hope you feel a bit more connected here:)

 

[arfie]

hello telly. welcome to the forum. i beg to disagree that that is enough about you, but it is plenty to get the dialog rolling.

"try harder" was my life mantra for my childhood and the meanest of my recovery years. if i can just be the perfect daughter, student, worker, lover and whatever other yaddah blah-ed my way i could? ? ? well? ? ? i'm 70 now and have kinda lost track of what i was trying to accomplish with all that hoped for perfection. these days i solidly believe there is such a thing as trying too hard and shoot for gentle compassion and awareness.

but that is me and every case is unique.

gentle support while i await to hear more about you. welcome aboard.

 

[Susan Jane]

Hi..
I don’t really know what to say.. Found out I had ptsd in 2018.. before that I thought if I just try hard enough then one day I might feel like I’m normal..like I belong..like I have any value as a human being..
Right after the diagnosis I felt empowered. Now I knew why I didn’t feel all of those things. Time to try even harder.. Time to heal.. but as time has passed I find myself losing hope..feeling even more isolated..therapy feels like a task instead of help and other people just seem unreachable.. well enough about me

Welcome here, a forum that I only found about 5 weeks ago. Trying harder, being diligent, fitting in, yes I understand. I worked myself into collapse. Hope goes out when we feel we are outside the circle and don’t fit in. This is not true, just a lifetime of trying to fit in a scheme. I think you will find it comforting here …knowing that other people understand, and support each other. Susan .

 

[thursday]

Hi Telly,

Normal people haven't got the shipping container to drag around like we have. I said to myself, look there those 2 people over there, they are normal. I want to be be like them, normal. But I still don't know how. There's a distance, actually from before the wheel of our ship got stuck in the ocean. The crew is doing their best. Art can be a help full outlet. I'm describing a painting of my, where I'm on a rock too far away from the shore to swim there.