I Could Stop Some Of Them.

[Friday]

Welcome to the forums. :)

Spoiler: Just kicking knowledge

All of that I've said to prove, if only to myself, that I DO have PTSD, and that what I've been through IS worthy of the pain and time lost and other struggles that I've experienced.

They should learn to take new people at face value until shown otherwise, but hey, lack of trust is one of the biggest symptoms associated with trauma so that is inevitable here I guess lol

I'm one of the people who, when I care more than I have lately, point people at other resources. PTSD isn't the worst, much less most painful, thing out there. It's just a thing. One of many disorders that share symptoms, can even share causes, but have very different treatments. As an example, if someone has an attachment disorder resulting from trauma? They need very, very different things than someone who has PTSD resulting from trauma. Even though they both came from trauma, and even though they both share symptoms. If someone has both? An attachment disorder & PTSD? (Quite a few peeps on here who do.) Then treatment needs to contain -and be very aware- of both, so that the treatment for one doesn't make the other worse.

The same is true with any 2 disorders. Or combo of disorders.

Imagine, for example, that you weren't being treated for trauma, but for a delusional disorder. Every time you're in therapy told that what you think happened? Didn't.

Can you imagine how much that would f*ck you up?

Misdiagnosis seriously hurts people.

So while @mary1979 imagines suspicion & disbelief & jadedness... For myself it couldn't be further from the truth. I absolutely believe someone when they say that the worst thing that has ever happened to them was being spoken to sharply by a teacher one time. I believe that their pain is so intolerable that they're suicidal. I believe them when they say that one time of being told they weren't good enough has caused them to suffer nightmares, and intrusive thoughts, and panic attacks, and become a recluse. Their pain is 100% real. And they 100% deserve help. But if they try and find help in PTSD-land? It's not going to help them. It will make them worse. And, tragically, it could kill them. They need real help. Not a sexy Acronym. The label isn't going to make them better. Real help, for what's really wrong, will be what makes them better. But some people get this idea that _______ disorder validates their pain or problems. Which is a very different thing than finally having a name, a reason, that explains ones problems!

((It's not just PTSD. Go to an ADHD community, & there will be people there, too, thinking that ADHD validates them. Or an Autism Spectrum Disorder validates them. Or a Bipolar Disorder validates them. It makes me sad :( Because no one needs a disorder to be validated. Disorders? Try and describe US, not the other way around. Whatever a person's pain or problems are? Are enough. Period. But if you're PTSD? It doesn't matter how validated you feel by a Bipolar, Autism, or ADHD diagnosis. It will be the wrong thing, and you will suffer -greatly- instead of getting help. Again, it just makes me very, very sad. That people lose years of their lives, or even lose their life, over clinging to an idea that A is "better" than B. :( ))

Does any of this relate to you? Maybe. Probably not. :P

((Or I wouldn't be talking about it. I quite simply don't care enough about people who are bound and determined that being spoken sharply to is the exact same as child abuse & neglect, death, & sexual violence... And instead of finding real help for themselves want to f*ck up their lives even further.))

But since questioning our diagnosis is something most of us do (and IMO all of us should do), and it was brought up? My .02 on the matter. When I question someone? It's because I do care. And do believe them.

 

[Sideways]

Welcome to the forum!

From what you're saying, you're using a strategy to cope with extreme emotions, and it's a strategy that is perfectly safe for you and everyone around you? No destructive behaviour, no meds, no drugs, no drink, no self harm - a strategy that is 100% safe for you and everyone around you??

Wowsers! That's fantastic! Hold onto that one. You'll need it less and less as time goes on, but if it's helping you cope and recover? Use it whenever you damn well need to:)

 

[mrsmegan]

Wow - I don't even know what to say except that I can relate to you so, so much.

You are not alone, at all, and it is such a horrible feeling to feel as though you are manipulating other people because you need/desire comfort. I am right there with you.

You have absolutely inspired me to talk about this with my therapist and try to put to words more what I am really feeling and needing in the moment instead of feeling like I need to "do something" to deserve to get those needs met.

Seriously - thank you for asking this question and being open here. You are not alone.

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

Welcome, Lissar!
You have found the right place to say whatever you need or want to say, and you will be treated with kindness, compassion, and empathy! We are ALL suffering...in different stages...but still suffering. I don't believe we can quantify, or compare pain, trauma, and experiences because emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical pain is REAL and different for everyone! No ONE'S trauma and pain are the same, but we all need the comfort of knowing we are NOT alone. YOU are NOT ALONE HERE!!! No judgement, no criticism, no disbelief. You are suffering. You need comforted. HERE, you will find understanding and as much comforting as can be done in "cyber-land".

You DO NOT DESERVE TO SUFFER, under ANY circumstances. NONE! You are reaching out for help, and comfort, and to be acknowledged as a person in a state of deep suffering. I have not one inkling of a doubt that you are suffering, and that you deserve better than you have been given.

Just don't give up...even if it's one step forward, and two steps back sometimes...just keep trying!
I DO hope you will find comfort and understanding here. I have, and I know I have the support of some really AWESOME people here! You deserve the same!

Blessings of Peace sent your way...(((hugs))) :hug:for comfort if it's okay...:hug:
AKJ

 

[joeylittle]

I just feel so bad for putting my therapist through it when I COULD (sometimes) ground myself and prevent it from going so far. I feel like it's almost faking it in terms of making it seem like it's beyond my control when I could potentially get myself out of it (although not in a healthy way either... more by just shutting it down and disconnecting entirely, which isn't desirable either), although the emotions and needs behind it are always real.

I would bring this up with your therapist. It's a good thing that you are aware of your motivations, and that somewhere in there, you think you might be manipulating your therapist into giving you 'extra' support. I would honestly doubt that you are successfully manipulating her - needs are needs are needs, and you don't actually control when or how she chooses to help you re-ground. That's always up to her.

But, you have the sense that you understand how to motivate her behavior, and you are concerned that you are somehow doing something wrong.

The therapist/client relationship is a very unique one, and sometimes we do need to talk about the relationship (with the therapist) directly. I encourage you to go ahead and do so.