Relationship I Don't Understand Him

[Cavegirl]

I don't understand. He seems to ignore me when he has "home time" and is in town. We've talked about it before and he said something about having been alone so long and he's afraid etc. but then few weeks later he tells me he's requested home once a month instead of every 2-4 months. But here it is... Home time again and we had plans to go to breakfast Sunday morning. He was supposed to call me sat night for time and location. No call. Ignored my text, and rejected my phone call. I don't get it. His words when he's on the road do NOT match his actions when he's home. He has military PTSD and has been single a pretty long time, he's a truck driver and is isolated pretty much ALL the time. I don't know if I should be patient or if he's just leading me on.

 

[Stickler]

Dunno.
My thought would be to tell him that if he wants you, he's going to have to come get you. Sort of...make clear that you want to be gotten, right?

But ( and this is NOT the way to put it to him ) he has to be tall enough to ride the ride. Otherwise you're wasting your time.
He has to get out of his fear and work to make it happen?
If you do all the work for him it will screw things up long-term, I think.

You're a lot less scary when he's not home, I guess.

 

[EveHarrington]

If he wants you, he will chase you.

Otherwise you'll never know if he keeps you around just because you happen to be there.

 

[Cavegirl]

Today he contacted me at 6:30 am. He thought we were making plans this morning. I'm seeing him this evening. I have noticed he will not say he wants to see me. I get, "I'm not doing anything.... if you want to come out you're welcome to" I asked him point blank if he wanted me to come see him and got "huuuuunnnnn." Like he was tormented. so I don't think he can put himself out there like that. He said he isn't good at social decisions. Looks like I'll be making all the plans etc.