I Hate My Therapist. Advice Please?!

[Laura 2]

@Bronswan - excellent point about the quality of the therapeutic relationship.That seems to have been forgotten in the NHS's 'unit processing' approach to patients.

...and welcome!

 

[BloomInWinter]

My therapists don't believe in comparative suffering, and neither do I.

Dump this invalidating person. The way you are being treated is not the way a good therapist would go about creating a safe space. But I hope you tell her why. A simple "I find your comments invalidating and judgmental. I find you untrustworthy and unsafe to speak to."

She just might learn something. But regardless of what she says after, you will have stood up for yourself, and that is no small thing.

 

[Laura 2]

"I find your comments invalidating and judgmental. I find you untrustworthy and unsafe to speak to."

Blinkin' ace @BloomInWinter

 

[GWhizz]

Fire her! It is not her job to state the obvious. And for all she knows, you may now feel afraid to tell her more for fear of being labelled a 'chronic complainer'! You are there to find a safe non-judgemental space where you can trust enough to share your encounters/issues, not be told they're not that bad. Sigh - I do wonder why and how some people get into this profession, though I guess everyone's human right?!

 

[Laura 2]

@HAlex You could, of course, print out this thread and give it to her!!

 

[silkleaves]

You could, of course, print out this thread and give it to her!!

At first I laughed about this...and then realized wait, that's a dang good idea. Might do her attitude / professionalism a bit of good to see how the reaction is towards the way she is blowing off the needs of someone who is coming to her for help and the negative effect it is causing.

 

[ihateusernames]

I'll throw this in in the off chance that you do print it out for your therapist, @HAlex. I told my therapist only maybe 15% of my actual issues, but when I told her, I also said: "It's just really not a big deal, not that bad, I know people who had it far worse..." and she cut me off and said "It's bad enough." And y'know, that is the absolute correct response. Nothing else is going to be helpful for you and I don't see the lady you've been talking to changing so even if you have to wait awhile to get somebody else-- it's not like she's helping you now.

 

[StellaBlue]

You're right though, only those that have it can understand someone else that has it.

I disagree. I think that there are well-trained empathetic therapists that can understand someone else's pain and help with healing that pain. I also think there are a bunch of less-than-qualified folks hanging out a shingle and, perhaps unintentionally perhaps not, causing more even more pain.