Well last night I went with Ryan to the Mall. I even put on make-up (which for some reason seemed to amuse other people.. kinda made me self-conscious actually.) We went there and shopped in a few stores, sat in the food court and ate etc. At one point we were in this little store and it just packed with people. I pretty much needed to leave at that point. Anyways, while sitting in the food court and eating, I was watching people go by. I'm sure my head was swiveling as I tried to watch everyone at the same time. While sitting there I realized two things. A) I need to know where people are, in relation to where I am, at all times. The fact that I can't do that in public sends me over the edge. So I don't feel safe near people, still. B) I don't understand why people want to gather in a public place. So I know that A) is hypervigilance and is directly related to how safe I feel. Although I've come part of the way, I still have a long way to go on this. However B) has me stumped. I truly don't get it. Ryan felt that I have just been isolating for too long, hence my lack of understanding. Which, could very well, be it. But I'm not sure. I mean I just don't get it. Why do people want to go there? It's like a night out to many and the shopping (never got that either) draws a lot. So any insights?