So sorry to know you are still living with yours. I am not any more, almost two decades ago, but she is still more present in my life than some important people that are real and present.All this stuff in my humble opinion is about this . Slave and owner. Sex is part of it but it’s not sexual per se, it’s dominance.
Im sorry you saw your abuser. I hope you can get her out of your head somehow. I am living with mine. She plays the role. That’s because of re enactment and for me the pattern just continues.
Psyops. Psychological manipulation and abuse. It might not look terrible on the surface but it’s real.
It's complex, and as you say, it's terrible.
About manipulation and dominance, yep