I want to give up at times

[Deleted member 42984]

I'm struggling tremendously atm. This morning I woke up and I just wanted to give up. And the emotional pain/depression is too much to bear for me, so I suppress, causing anxiety and headaches. Sometimes I feel I'm about to faint, cuz of all the internal pressure. I can't think of anything to do rather than sharing all of it with my NA sponsor, which I just did. It doesn't make it go away, but my hope is that some day I'll be able to actually feel my emotions instead of suppressing/escaping/denying them. It is causing much suffering indeed.

I can't get through this without support, at least I know that. So I'll just put these words out and hope for a little supportive kindness :-)

Does anyone of you relate to this, to not being able to actually feel ones emotions and instead pushing them away/suppressing them, causing lots of suffering (anxiety, internal pressure)?

 

[somerandomguy]

I pushed away my emotions for years, so I know how you feel. It sucks and I'm sorry you're having such a rough time right now.

It won't last forever, I promise you, because you're aware that you're doing it and you want to change it.

 

[Deleted member 42984]

Thanks for your support. It really got to me that my T quit his job, it was going so well with him. I maybe got dependent on him, but that's a positive kind of dependency because it was really helpful.

I'm going to see if I can get him, I'll just have to go a little farther, to a nearby town, for appointments in the future, but I'm willing to do that ...

*get him back, I meant

 

[LuckiLee]

You could start a trauma diary here. That way you can vent and get all your thoughts out. I hope you feel better soon!

 

[Mach123]

Hey I'm here. Im going through it buddy I need u 2! All my stuff is coming back up and my wife and I are struggling so, you have to hang in there with me, pm me any time if I can do anything. You don't have to be alone.

 

[FragileGlass]

While the short term is presenting terrible challenges, today felt like a ‘give up’ day. Instead you wrote it out here. Which makes me smile because inside you’re still in the long term mode.

That’s why I keep writing here...... because I know the short term is hell. But I feel the long term can and will be better, I love when I see my fellow sufferers change hats to support me, it means the world to me that they see past their story to write me a stand tall solidarity message. Or just remind me, I’m not alone whatsoever. No matter how we got here!

You my dear, are not alone. We’re all here with you ;)