I've been with my wife for 7 years, married 2 1/2. First year together was eventless, I was too oblivious to anything to be called conscious... Issues upon issues started after 1 year. I was in a mess of a state. I came from a fully abusive and dysfunctional family without even knowing it. And she pointed out every little bit of my problems. Which I diligently, but painfully slowly and badly at first tried to deal with all of them. But after 5 years, while having dealt with most of my problems, the quality of our relationship never improved. She was eventually hospitalized in mental unit, to come out after a few weeks with a borderline diagnosis. Another psychiatrist a year later changed it to bipolar. And now we have both agreed that it is PTSD (without psychiatrists involved). She displays every single signs perfectly. She's had flashbacks of parental sexual abuse while doing DMT (altough not that big of a surprise as she has always been wondering, she had vague weird memories that she brought up with me and her parent multiple times.), so I'm assuming this might be what it's about. Mixed with some of my own problems that of course went just in line with her traumas, really have laid a demanding situation on our couple. We also have 4 children under 6.
I will do everything I can possibly handle. But now I think I need to get involved in a bit of a support group (no local group available) to help myself deal with the stress and demands of caring for 4 children and a PTSD sufferer.
I think it's really hard for her, she was abused quite early on, and so her entire life is built on undiagnosed / untreated PTSD along with a generally dysfunctional childhood family life.
And because I also come from a fairly dysfunctional family, I have to wade my way through learning a lot about what's normal vs abnormal.. (I had a very narcissistic and emotionally unstable mother, and a father that I absolutely never have emotionally connected to.)
I don't talk to my family at all anymore, we'd rather keep her mental health state away from her family (they're not of the very mental health aware type) and so I'm left with a new therapist I can talk to once a week for an hour. But I think I need a bit more to cope with the daily efforts, people to talk to.
It seems to me that because she grew up with PTSD, it changes it in a few ways that make it a bit harder to recognize and relate to other people with recent sudden traumas.
We both don't work, because 4 kids plus taking care of the symptoms takes all of our time. And so we're always together, which is a bit demanding for me in the way of rarely have time outside this situation. She seems interested in me working, but I'm afraid, as any higher stress level on me just makes me handle her episodes not as good as usual, which spirals down really quickly
So I guess hello everyone, and I hope to build some good relationships here.
I will do everything I can possibly handle. But now I think I need to get involved in a bit of a support group (no local group available) to help myself deal with the stress and demands of caring for 4 children and a PTSD sufferer.
I think it's really hard for her, she was abused quite early on, and so her entire life is built on undiagnosed / untreated PTSD along with a generally dysfunctional childhood family life.
And because I also come from a fairly dysfunctional family, I have to wade my way through learning a lot about what's normal vs abnormal.. (I had a very narcissistic and emotionally unstable mother, and a father that I absolutely never have emotionally connected to.)
I don't talk to my family at all anymore, we'd rather keep her mental health state away from her family (they're not of the very mental health aware type) and so I'm left with a new therapist I can talk to once a week for an hour. But I think I need a bit more to cope with the daily efforts, people to talk to.
It seems to me that because she grew up with PTSD, it changes it in a few ways that make it a bit harder to recognize and relate to other people with recent sudden traumas.
We both don't work, because 4 kids plus taking care of the symptoms takes all of our time. And so we're always together, which is a bit demanding for me in the way of rarely have time outside this situation. She seems interested in me working, but I'm afraid, as any higher stress level on me just makes me handle her episodes not as good as usual, which spirals down really quickly
So I guess hello everyone, and I hope to build some good relationships here.
