How does one become their own rescuer, or how do they rescue themselves?
The first, I don't know. It just happened one day. I was about 14, actually. I was in a bit of a scrape. I hadn't gotten myself into it, but no one else was going to get me out of it. It wasn't unusual for me to get myself in and out of scrapes, or find myself in them through no fault of my own. I did so most of my childhood. What was different was the mental shift that happened. I became my own responsibility. While I might enlist other people's help, while someone might show up, step in, or do something? They might. But I must. Because this was my life. Not anyone else's. I came into my own. It was oddly painful and oddly freeing.
((I wasn't an adult, per se. I had virtually no experience in the world, I made thousands of mistakes. But they were mine to make, and I learned from them. I still learn from my mistakes and I'm over 30. Growing up didn't mean I was always alone it the world, it meant that I could be. Even if I made mistakes.))
How one rescues themselves? That, my friend, changes in each and every scenario life throws at you.
In some, there is literally nothing one can do to change the situation. I was chained in a cinderblock room, at one point. Just my hands I could have -in theory- broken my thumbs... But I was still locked in. Wrists and ankles chained? I cannot break my feet and run away. I was trapped. Literally. So I waited. Not for someone to save me. If they did? Awesome! But I wasn't holding out on it. I waited to die. I waited to escape. I waited to be let go. I waited to grieve, to fall apart later. I waited for something to change that would let me do something. I tried to affect change. I learned to laugh, to be with my own thoughts, to be alone in the dark and amuse myself (boredom will really drive you mad) instead of terrify myself. I learned patience. Lol. I learned all of these things by not doing them to begin with. And learned that they were mistakes. Being let free? That was luck. Learning? That's what saved me.
That's a bit of an extreme example. But there are thousands of times in our lives where we are powerless over everything except ourselves. Even having power over ourselves? Pfft. Doesn't mean we get what we want. I want to not be in pain, to not be in the middle of a panic attack, to not be outnumbered, to be stronger, to be smarter, to be braver. To not, to be, to not... I may want it. But that doesn't mean I get it. It just means that I have the power to try.
In other scenarios, there are many things one might do to save themselves. Sometimes too many things, it seems. Hard lessons there, as well. Learning what the right choices -for us- are. But it starts at the same base: I am responsible for myself. Okay. So what do I need? What do I want? What can I do?
